


Flatmates

by kokichirin



Series: My Flatmate's an Incubus [1]
Category: New Dangan Ronpa V3: Everyone's New Semester of Killing
Genre: Alternate Universe - Non-Despair (Dangan Ronpa), M/M, Slow Burn, Sumb, WOW I FORGOT, alt title: saihara needs a coffee and sleep: the musical, basically everyones in college now, because who doesnt like College Hijinks, but hes not gonna do evil stuff so its all good, but saiharas gonna have a rough time, coughs quietly, enjoy, get ready folks, gonna update the tags as the fic progresses, oumas a literal demon btw Enjoy, thanks zetta for this tag its so fuckin accurate, this is gonna be a, uh more tags will be added soon
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-11-24
Updated: 2018-10-07
Packaged: 2019-02-06 07:44:21
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 18
Words: 27,440
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12812874
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kokichirin/pseuds/kokichirin
Summary: If God existed, he must've really enjoyed fucking with Shuichi Saihara. It all started when he put out a call for flatmates. Saihara was enrolled in the freshly built college of Hope's Peak Academy, meant to further nurse Japan's greatest talents from high school. To improve results, flats were provided to give them a sense of independence from their families. With that in mind, flatmates were a must to have them adjust to someone coexisting in their quarters.With that in mind, Saihara had no idea the storm he was in for.





	1. The (Booty) Call

**Author's Note:**

> hi im kokichirin  
> i do that youtube thing where i put mediocre art into motion  
> i like ouma and saihara and saiouma alot  
> and now im getting off my ass and attempting to write my love for these nerds  
> so i rly like magic and supernatual stuff  
> and stuff like demons and angels and witches and ye  
> so theres a bunch of that  
> get ready my dudes

If God existed, he must've _really_ enjoyed fucking with Shuichi Saihara. It all started when he put out a call for flatmates. Saihara was enrolled in the freshly built college of Hope's Peak Academy, meant to further nurse Japan's greatest talents from high school. To improve results, flats were provided to give them a sense of independence from their families. With that in mind, flatmates were a must to have them adjust to someone coexisting in their quarters.

With that in mind, Saihara had no idea the storm he was in for.

One evening, the detective was clocking out from his job. He had managed to secure a job as a barista at the local cafe, giving him a hint of excitement into his life, from guys ordering the various mixtures available to girls cooing over his looks, silently causing him to wish he was allowed to wear his hat so he could hide. He stretched the tension from his muscles before coming to his door, unlocking it and slipping inside. Perhaps he could fix something to snack on or maybe try to make his own personal drink from what he's picked up and—who is that on his couch.

Saihara stared incredulously at the boy in front of him, thoroughly fixated on the tv in front of him. The show caused him to raise a slight eyebrow, a girl with strange purple skin trying and failing to properly act normal, her mannerisms resembling that of a horse. Before he opened his mouth to speak, the boy interrupted him.

"Y'know, the second movie's better."

"Who are you and why are you in my flat." Might as well get it over with. The purple haired youth finally turned to him, smiling a wide grin with matching eyes swirling with an air of mystery.

"I'm your flatmate, duh! I saw you had a call out so I had to act fast before someone super boring beat me to it."

"How did you know--"

"I asked the headmaster, duh." Wow, rude? "Anyways, I’m Kokichi Ouma, the ultimate Supreme Leader!" he sat up straight, clearly proud of his title. Ah, a fellow student, that makes sen—wait.

Saihara's eyes widened. Back in the high school, he's heard rumors of him, but never actually saw him. He lead an organization of over 10,000 members, but at the same time, he was a compulsive liar and prankster. Yet according to some people, while he's almost never seen, when he was, there was something... off about him. The eyes most likely. They always felt like they were sizing you up, undressing you until nothing but your soul was left. A kind of gaze that'd have you freeze in place, wondering just what the hell he was going to do.

"Hellooooo, earth to Saihara-chan!" Ouma called out, waving his hand and snapping the detective back to reality.

"Oh, uh.. sorry. Just.. That's a familiar name, I didn’t... expect..." Saihara trailed off as he noticed the smaller boy's gaze, locking eyes with one another. It was like staring into a dark pool of lavender, threatening to lull him to sleep. The raven haired boy couldn't help the heat that creeped up to his cheeks as he realized just how captivating the sight was. He caught the shift in the leader's expression, wide eyed curiosity to a lazy grin, eyes slightly relaxed.

It took all of Saihara's willpower to tear his eyes away.

“I-I'm sorry, Ouma-kun." He muttered wearily, rubbing his eyes as he shuffled back. “I had a long day, I’m tired. Help yourself to whatever, and we can talk more tomorrow."

"Assuming I’ll still be here, my beloved Saihara-chan!” the boy in question nearly choked at the nickname. "After all, I could've been lying about the call! Or maybe I’m lying about lying? Who knows!" It’s too late for this shit.

"Good night, Ouma-kun.” Saihara said with a slight exhaustion to his tone before shutting himself into his room. Ouma stared at the door before giggling to himself, tongue peeking out to wet his slightly dried lips. A slightly fanged grin graced his features.

"Such an interesting scent.. He’s perfect."

* * *

In the dead of the night, Saihara begun to shift in his sleep. His dreams had taken hold, and he found himself face to face with a familiar purple haired male, those matching eyes drawing him in once again. Ouma was sitting on what seemed to be a counter, legs crossed and a playful smile dancing on his lips.

"Saihara-chaaan~.." he cooed to the detective, beckoning him with a curled finger. Almost on it's own free will, his body slowly closed the distance between them until Ouma had his legs wrapped around Saihara's waist, using a hand to caress his cheek. In the back of his mind, he couldn’t help but wonder why the hell is he having this dream. He literally knew nothing about him to warrant dreams this intimate, but once Ouma spoke again, those thoughts vanished, his silky voice melting away all rational thought and tempting him like the sweetest honey.

"C'mon, my beloved _Shuichi_ ," Saihara's breath hitched, a fire starting in the depths of his soul at hearing his name be so sensually purred. "Let's play together..." the leader moved to cup his cheeks with his hands and began to lean in, Saihara moving to meet him halfway.

With a fire igniting his skin, he blinked awake with a gentle moan. He stared up at the ceiling with red dusting his cheeks, wondering what any of that dream meant. He felt a tight sensation at his pants, and something weighting it down. When he looked to see what the culprit was, his heart nearly leaped out of his chest. Sitting on his crouch was Kokichi Ouma, violet eyes shining with that mysterious sense, a dash of something much more tempting in the mix. What caught Saihara of guard the most was the slightly small wings and horns attached to his body. A sudden coil-like squeeze of his thigh suggested there was a tail to complete the set.

"O-Ouma-kun?? What are you d-doing??" Saihara stammered, a bright red staining his face.

"Nishishi.. What does it look like, my beloved? I’m helping myself to a little midnight snack! Oh, but don’t worry, I'm not actually going to eat you." He waved a hand dismissively. Saihara gulped, the pieces slowly clicking together in his half asleep brain.

"S-so you're a... a-a..." There's no way this was real.

"That's right!" Ouma grinned a fangy grin. "Kokichi Ouma, proud incubus for your pleasure!'

_My god, it was real._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> yeet  
> despite ouma being an incubus theres not gonna be any smut tho since im kinda  
> dnsjkfnsf about writing that sorry yall orz  
> there is gonna be sexual humor tho  
> at least no more than what youd expect in canon  
> stay alive saihara-chan


	2. Everything You Always Wanted to Know About Incubi (But Were Too Afraid To Ask)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> more or less a summary of oumas incubusness and a few headcanons i have  
> aka the exposition chapter lmao  
> BTW THANKS FOR ALL THE KUDOS AND SUPPORT IM LITERALLY CRYING??? ;____; <3333

Saihara stared at the boy in front of him, the words spinning in his head like a hamster wheel. If there’s anything he was good at, it was delayed reactions. So naturally, Ouma yelped in surprise as he was ungracefully kicked off the detective's lap as the latter pulled himself into a sitting position, nearly curled into a ball.

"S-stop fooling around and take those weird things off!" Saihara breathed nervously, moving his leg to try and get the tail off. Ouma stared, lavender eyes growing large and watery.

"You didn’t have to kick me.. I was just teasing you..." he whimpered before letting out an ear shattering wail. "WAAAAAAAAAAAH, YOU’RE _AWFUL_ , SAIHARA-CHAAAAAAN!!" Saihara winced, plugging his ears in an attempt to block out the sound.

"Ok, ok, I’m sorry I kicked you, really! Please stop crying!" Saihara whined.

"Well, I suppose I can accept that for now." Ouma shrugged, the detective reeling at the sudden switch from sobs to stotic indifference. Shaking his head, he decided to probe a bit.

"So you're just faking right? You can take those off?" he frowned, pushing a finger against one of the horns. What he expected was for the horn to feel like plastic and fall off. What he _didn’t_ except was for it to be made of actual bone and for him to make an… interesting noise. Saihara withdrew his hand immediately as he tried to forcibly delete the sound from his head. “Ok you can’t. So you’re an actual.. incubus..” the detective sighed.

“Yeah! You thought I was lying?” Saihara quirked a brow. “Hey, I tell truths too. Lies are just more fun!” Ouma pulled himself into a sitting position, legs crossed and hands grabbing his ankles as he bounced in place. “I can tell you’re still curious, so ask me anything you like! You have three questions.”

“Didn’t you say I could ask anything? That’d probably mean more than three questions.” Saihara sighed.

“I sure did! By the way, you have two now.” The incubus giggled at his flatmates exhausted expression.

“Ok..” he sighed. “So… does anyone else know about this? You being an incubus, I mean.” Ouma hummed before grinning.

“The entire school knows! Why else would I be like some kinda urban legend, hmmm?” Saihara lowered his head slightly in a thoughtful manner. That would explain why he wasn’t familiar with him, despite being in the same class and people only knew him by name—“Nishishi, that’s a lie! School’s boring as hell so I just don’t show up that much!” What.

“B-but, how—“ Saihara stopped himself. He was gonna waste a question. He cleared his throat before speaking carefully. “I mean… how do you eat, exactly? You don’t eat…. Uhh..” His face slowly turned red as he struggled to form the words.

“Oh you mean human baby batter?” Ouma said bluntly, causing the other male to choke. “I mean, I _suppose_. But I’ve personally gotten a taste for sugar. Gotta hand it to you humans, you make some good treats!” he gave a gentle twitch of the wings. “Just keep the cabinets stocked up on chocolate and Panta and you don’t have to worry about me sucking your dick in the middle of the night.”

“Was that what you were going to do before I woke up??” Saihara nearly screeched. Was that wasting a question? Did he go over the limit? Probably.

“Nishishi! Nah, that was a lie too!” Ouma grinned, clearly enjoying his flatmate’s distress. “I just wanted to mess with you, see if you’d wake up.” Saihara paused for a bit before sighing, running a hand down his face in an exhausted manner. This was his life now, he supposed.

“Alright, if that’s the case, why not just go find someone else to feed off of? I don’t suppose it matters, right?” he groaned. He looked up from beneath his fingers and was greeted to the sight of the incubus with his wings fanned out, an indignant glare staining his features.

“Wow, you must reaaaally think lowly of incubi! We don’t just feed off _anyone_ , we have mates, y’know!” he huffed, tears gathering at the corners of his eyes. Saihara flinched. Oh shit he’s gonna cry again—

“No no no no no don’t cry—“ Saihara waved his hands. “I didn’t know, I’m sorry!” He had to pick his words carefully. “If that’s the case, shouldn’t you go find yours..? You have one, don’t you?” Ouma blinked, a blank expression on his face.

“Uh, yeah? Why else would I be here?” Saihara started to sputter.

“W-wait, what, I—I didn’t agree to that!” he wished he had his hat on so he could hide his face, but alas, the poor boy had to settle with covering himself with a pillow. After a moment of silence, he peeked at the sound of the purple haired boy bursting out into laughter.

“Hah, got you again, Saihara-chan! I don’t have a mate!” he teased between giggles. “Besides, you don’t even come close to meeting my high standards!” Saihara didn’t know if that was an insult or not. After his laughter died down, Ouma tilted his head. “So, are you good now? You get what you’re getting into?”

“It’s not like I had a choice in the matter, but I suppose…” Saihara sighed, slowly regretting putting out that fucking call.

“Good, good!” Ouma clapped his hands as he finally let his tail uncoil from the other’s leg. “Now that you’re awake, will you let me feed, my beloved Saihara-chan?”

Ouma never found himself outside of a room as fast as he did in that moment.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry its a bit short ;w; next chapter ill try to make longer  
> they have classes and get to talk to their classmates so thatll be fun-


	3. When The Sexual Tension Is Thick Enough To Actually Feel

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> YES HI HELLO FLATMATES GOT FANART AND I AM ONE HAPPY BEAN  
> https://roplada.tumblr.com/post/168374290175/we-talk-about-so-many-ideas-on-the-saiouma-discord thank u rop im love u (also congrats yall u now kno what incubus!ouma looks like  
> SO ANYWAY CHAPTER 3   
> im giving the chapters names now  
> the gay unboyfriends have classes now and ouma might have a bit of trouble

Saihara groaned as the alarm next to his bed screeched into the room. After a few missed attempts, he slapped the clock in a way that caused it to flip off the nightstand and clatter to the floor. Oh well, at least it stopped. The raven haired male pulled himself from under the covers, hair a mess and slight bags under his eyes as he tried to mentally sort himself out. First stage was denial, right? That’s what he was feeling about the previous night. The Incubus part, anyways. Pushing the thoughts out of his head, he got out of bed and went to the bathroom to wash up and get dressed.

Once he made his way downstairs to brew a cup of (much needed) coffee, he stopped in his tracks upon seeing his new flatmate on the couch. Horns and everything… Still there. He scrunched up his nose as he realized his attire was different than the day before. Shorts and a sort of crop top, both a matching deep purple. He definitely wasn’t staring, especially with the knowledge of the other male’s soft-looking (wait, what the fuck, Saihara-) stomach being clearly visible. He was torn from his thoughts when the other spoke up.

“Ohhh, checking me out, are you~? I thought you said you weren’t interested!” Ouma giggled as he crawled to the arm of the couch, batting his eyelashes as he lowered his voice to a purr. “Or have you decided to give me a chance after all?”

“You are not going to class like that.” Saihara said bluntly as he ducked into the kitchen, hiding his reddened cheeks. How else was he supposed to react to a half dressed person trying to seduce him in his own house?

“Whoa, hey, who said I was going to class?” Ouma pouted as he followed into the kitchen. “I, for one, am planning on marathoning my favorite show.”

“And ruin my cable bill with horses—“

“Ponies.”

“ _Ponies_ ,” he pinched the bridge of his nose. “--while I’m out? Sorry, but unless you’re gonna pitch in, you’re not doing this. That’s rule #1.”

Ouma’s eyes welled up as a small whimper began to bubble up. It was way too early for this. Saihara tensed, before sighing.

“Look, I’m still trying to adjust to the fact that I’m basically housing a sex demon. I’d appreciate if you’d at least listen and respect my demands.”

“Hmm, ok!” The small incubus grinned, the tears in his eyes disappearing. “I can always record them later!” Saihara quirked a brow. “…And I _suppose_ I can go to school. But if it’s boring, then consider me a squatter!”

“Uh, ok..” Saihara sighed a bit as he finished making his cup of coffee. “Mind if you go change, then? Especially considering it’s colder outside than inside.” Ouma nodded with a teasing grin and remark (‘Aww, you _do_ care about me!♡’) before leaving the already exhausted detective to his drink.

Half a cup in, Ouma returned with a cozy looking purple hoodie and dark colored distressed jeans. Saihara nearly choked on his drink when he noticed his… extremities were gone.

“W-wh— I—You said you couldn’t take them off!” Saihara blurted.

“Yeah, I can’t. Didn’t say I couldn’t _hide_ them, though~!” Ouma grinned. "Did you really missed the first time we met?" _Which was yesterday?_

Saihara gulped down the rest of his coffee before getting up and grabbing his things.

"Ok, fine, I’m not gonna question it. Let’s just hurry before we’re late for class." The detective muttered before scurrying out the house, the smaller boy skipping behind him.

 

* * *

 

"Alright." Saihara rubbed his temple as they walked towards their class. Listening to Ouma chatter about more 'fun facts' about incubi this early in the morning was a killer. He probably could've gone the rest of his life without knowing _different_ ways they can feed, but life seems to hate his guts. "We're here. Can you at least _try_ to behave yourself and not get in trouble?"

"Yes, Daddy~" Ouma cooed.

"You can start by _never saying that again._ " The detective felt a piece of him die inside as he opened the door. The incubus snickered as he began to walk in, only to recoil back outside immediately after, hand to his nose and an inkling of his horns peeking out.

"What the actual fuck--?!"

"Ouma-kun, are you ok?" Saihara gaped. Ouma breathed out before running his hands through his hair, horns disappearing as if it was magic (which it probably was).

"Uh, ok. How do I explain this in a way a human would understand.." he mumbled mostly to himself before speaking up. "Ever been to a perfume shop and the smell hits you like a freight train?" Saihara nodded slowly. "Yeah, that’s. That's this." The detective blinked in confusion as he watched the smaller male brace himself and go back into the classroom. Once Saihara followed, someone piped up. Someone he _really_ didn’t feel like talking to this early.

"Hey, Shithara! Who's the twink?" a girl with blonde hair separated in an interesting way was sitting a girl who looked similar to her, only with medium straight hair and a small ahoge at the top.

Ouma's nose twitched ever so slightly before he was covered by Saihara.

"Oh, uh, this is Ouma. Y'know, Ouma Kokichi?"

"The Ultimate Supreme Leader?" the ahoged girl piped in. "That's him?"

The male in question grinned as he puffed out his chest ever so slightly, clearly proud of his title.

"Yep! I’m also working part time as Saihara-chan's lover!" Three different chokes.

"O-Ouma-kun--!" the poor detective sputtered as he heard the other girl cackle.

"Hah, finally got yourself a boytoy, huh, Shithara? Or maybe you're the bottom bitch between the two?"

"Iruma-san, that’s--" the other girl blushed before Ouma spoke up.

"Ohh, that explains it." He giggled, practically tittering. "Iruma" quirked a brow and snorted.

"What does, ya twink?”

"Man, I know sexual frustration's a thing, but I’ve never seen it _this_ blatantly obvious. Sounds like you really need to get laid!" The girl in question flinched, her attitude clearly taking a hit from his words.

“What—that's b-bullshit!" she stammered. "I've gotten way more action than you ever did!" The incubus giggled once more as he strode closer.

“Ohh, I know a whore when I see one. And you, my dear, are one _in name only._ " He cooed, tapping her nose for an additional insult to injury. The girl was more or less reduced to a shivering mess, and a different scent hit Ouma's nose. He blinked in response, the pupils of his eyes turning into slits ever so slightly. That was probably his cue to stop.

Saihara was in the background at his seat, rubbing his face as the other girl sat next to him and shooting him a sympathetic look.

"So, how do you know him, Saihara-kun?"

"He's my flatmate..."

"Well, at least it won’t be boring?" the girl looked back at the two, only to see Ouma trot back to them and sit on the opposite side of Saihara, kicking his legs in a carefree like manner.

“Well, that was fun!" he chimed. As tempting as it was to mess with his new classmate, he already had his sights set on actual food, and not whatever the hell Iruma was giving off. Christ, instincts suck ass sometimes. "I think I might attend class more often if it means I get to mess with the horny bitch!" He could've _sworn_ the scent got stronger. Saihara caught the slight hint of fang in the purple haired males mouth. Before he could say anything, the classroom door swung open as the rest of the class and the professor filled the remaining spaces in the room.

 _'This is gonna be a long period…'_ Saihara thought to himself as he got his materials for the class ready.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> now its oumas turn to rip a little  
> wonder if his gonna expose his secret? :3c


	4. Constant Blue Balling

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this chapters all over the place im so rr y

Ouma stared ahead blankly with his head resting in his hands. His nose wouldn’t stop twitching. As the professor droned on with his lectures, the leader took the time to pick apart who was in the classroom. Miu’s scent seemed to have calmed down, so he could rest easy. But as a tradeoff, he was picking out different scents. Two in particular giving him a very bad vibe… What the hell was even with this class?

“Ouma-kun?” the boy was pulled from his thoughts as he looked up at the professor. “Can you please focus on the lecture and stop zoning out?”

“Oh, but I am, teach!” Ouma pouted. The professor wrinkled his nose ever so slightly.

“If you have, would you mind giving us the answer?” The leader flicked his eyes towards the board for a quick moment. A simple math problem. Well, simple to him anyways. Before he opened his mouth, he heard a familiar voice behind him.

“Bet he was too busy thinking about Shithara’s dick!” Saihara couldn’t fight down the flush that stained his face even if he tried.

“Pipe down, you self-projecting slut!” Ouma bit his lip as the scent came back. Focus on the board, focus on the board. “Anyways, the answer is 4.”

“…Very good, Ouma-kun. I would also appreciate it if you and Iruma-san would watch your language for the rest of the lecture.” Ouma gave a bright grin in response before letting it fall flat as he went back to his bored expression.

* * *

 

“Ok, so our classmates consist of-“ Ouma sniffed again. “Some boring humans, a temping food source, allergies, weird shit and magic.”

“They have names, y’know.” Saihara rose a brow as he stuffed his bag before getting up. “And what do you mean, ‘allergies’?”

As if faith would have it, a girl with snow white hair tied into low pigtails bounced close by.

“Yahooo~! Hello, Shuichi!” she gave a grin before turning to the boy still seated at his desk. “This is your new friend, yes?”

“Ah, hi, Angie… Yeah, this is _our classmate_ ,” Saihara didn’t miss those puppy dog eyes. “Ouma Kokichi. He’s the missing Supreme Leader, I suppose.” Angie took the purple haired boy’s hands into hers and shook them wildly.

“It’s very nice to meet you, Ouma! I’m Angie Yonaga, and I give you Atua’s blessings as well!” she dropped her grip and flashed a friendly smile while Ouma retreated almost immediately, holding his hands close. They felt like they were dipped in lava!

“Uh, yeah, likewise.” Ouma winced before getting up. “Anyways, I’d looooove to stay and chat and all, but I’m hungry!” He grabbed the detective by the wrist and ungracefully dragged him out of the classroom despite his protests. Angie tilted her head curiously, her smile becoming more off.

“Ouma-kun, you can get food by yourself!” Saihara frowned as they stopped in front of the dining hall. “You didn’t have to drag me!” Ouma frowned as he held up his hands, causing the detective to wince. His hands were red and bumpy, however the injuries were beginning to go away. “What the hell-“

“My allergies. There’s something about that Angie girl that doesn’t sit well with me.” Ouma pouted. “She ruined my beautiful hands!”

“But the bumps are going away.”

“That doesn’t change anything!” the incubus held his hands close to his chest, staring up at Saihara with watery eyes.

“Well, I guess we’ll have to make some excuse as to why she can’t touch you?” he offered half-heartedly. “She’s an artist; you could say you’re allergic to whatever paint residue she has on her? It’d at least keep your secret.”

Ouma blinked his tears away, smiling brightly.

“I knew you’d look after me, my beloved Saihara-chan!” Saihara flushed. At least it was better than Daddy. Saihara slipped past the other boy to enter the dining hall with Ouma tailing close behind. The smaller boy attached himself to the other’s arm, begging nonstop for every dessert the dining hall had to offer. He eventually settled for chocolate cake.

“Hey, hey, Saihara-chan, did you know my favorite cake is actually Angel Food Cake?”

“How ironic, considering what happened earlier.” Saihara said as he took a bite of his food. “I’m almost positive that’s a lie.”

“You know me so well!♥” the incubus giggled as he slowly licked the cake crumbs off his fork as he stared at the other boy. Saihara trained his eyes towards his own food in response, face a light red.

“Why do you keep doing that?”

“Doing what?”

“That. With the fork. The weird licking thing.”

“You mean making sure I don’t waste a single crumb of this delicious cake?” Ouma huffed. “Are you telling me humans don’t eat their food like that?”

“Unless they’re trying to get a point across, no.” Saihara coughed as he continued to eat.

“What point is that, I wonder~?” Ouma purred, continuing to eat the cake, stopping occasionally to lick at the fork. The detective swore in his head, trying hard to focus on his own food and not on the sight in the corner of his vision. Don’t focus on the feeling of those mystic purple eyes staring at him. Don’t focus on that soft looking tongue wrapping skillfully around that fork, coating it with a thin layer of saliva, and _definitely_ don’t focus on the growing curiosity of how that tongue would feel on his—

 _“Saihara-kun!”_ Saihara’s head snapped up at the voice, seeing the girl with the ahoge approaching the table.

“O-oh, hi, Akamatsu-san.” The detective felt a wave of relief wash over him, while the smaller male looked up at Akamatsu with slitted eyes, puffing out his cheeks. He had finally gotten another whiff of that absolutely intoxicating scent… As if he was a spoiled child, he turned his head and pointed his nose upwards with a little _‘hmph!’_

“Uhh… Can I not sit here?” she asked curiously.

“You can! Please.” Saihara said a little too intently. The incubus huffed as he scarfed down the rest of his cake. Akamatsu blinked before she slowly sat down next to Saihara.

“So… You’re Ouma Kokichi, right?” she smiled, trying to make small talk. “I’m Akamatsu Kaede, the Ultimate Pianist!” The incubus gave a wide grin.

“Nice to meet you, Akamatsu-chan! To what pleasure do I owe you cockblocking me?” The pianist turned a bright red as she began to sputter.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t know you were together or anything like that--!”

“That’s because we’re _not_.” Saihara interjected, frowning. “He’s my flatmate, and nothing more.”

Ouma paused for a moment before he began to sniffle. Akamatsu caught it on quickly and began to panic a little.

“Ah, no, don’t cry--!” she fumbled. She looked to her friend for help, who just looked back with a flat look.

“He’s faking it.” He stated simply. True to his word, the tears disappeared.

“Well, I’m still hurt. I’d at least like to think we’re friends!” Ouma crossed his arms. “If we’re gonna be sharing the same roof, that’s the least you can do! Or maybe you secretly hate me!”

“No, I don’t hate you—“ Saihara coughed before rubbing his face once more. He already felt a headache coming on, so he wanted to nurse it asap. “I’m sorry, Akamatsu-san, but I think I’ll have to excuse myself for now.” He stood up as he grabbed his plate. “I’ll talk to you some other time, ok?”

“Oh, ok?” Akamatsu nodded slowly, watching the detective leave. Ouma whined as he got up as well, following after him.

“Hey, you can’t just leave like that!” The incubus fussed. Saihara turned around and crossed his arms.

“Look, if you shush and behave yourself, I’ll buy you something on the way back, deal?”

Oumas eyes sparkled.

“Bribing me, Mr. Detective? I _suppose_ I can humor that and take you up on your offer! Just know my tastes, are _very_ expensive!” Ouma grinned as they left the building.

That in turn, was a lie, for the only thing he begged for was a simple pair cat patterned socks.

* * *

 

Saihara truly had no idea what to make of the small boy. The more he tried to tolerate him, the more worn out he became. He thought back to Akamatsu’s words, making himself comfortable at the kitchen table.

_‘Well, at least it won’t be boring?’_

He had to admit, that part was true. Ouma in his life was exciting in more ways he knew and was willing to admit. But he wonders if it’s really worth it? Can he even keep up with this? His thoughts were interrupted when he suddenly was greeted to a face full of socks, the many cat faces staring at him. He trailed his gaze upwards until he saw the grinning incubus, extremities back. He guessed he had to get used to seeing _that_ around the house.

“Look, Saihara-chan! Aren’t they adorable?” Ouma chimed. “You should get a pair too so we can match!”

“Yes, Ouma-kun, they’re adorable, but I’m fine with the socks I have.” He gently moved the incubus’s leg out of his face, only to find himself trapped as Ouma retaliated with wrapping both legs around his shoulders playfully, pulling him closer.

“Are you suuuure about that?” Ouma teased, licking his lips. Saihara’s face flushed as he wiggled free successfully.

“If it means dealing with that, I’m positive.” He muttered quietly. He supposed he’s gonna have to get used to the constant flirting as well. The incubus huffed, wings flapping slightly.

“You’re so _mean_ , Saihara-chan!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> saiharas gonna try  
> its gonna be hard but at least its something  
> alSO ive been hyping myself up for a future special and i think its bleeding into my writing fdjg  
> i promise when i get that out of the way ill do a better job of writing college hijinks


	5. Getting Some Pussy

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> im not sorry for the title

“I’m home.” Saihara called as he entered the house. It’s been roughly two months since his life seemed to flip the way it did. Housing an incubus constantly trying to seduce him was more tiring than he expected. And on that note…

“Welcome home, Saihara-chaaaaan~!” Ouma made his way to the door in nothing but an oversized, button up shirt, holding the middle as if it was a robe. Saihara knew immediately it was his and his feelings about it were… mixed. "Would you like me to prepare dinner, or perhaps run a bath? Or maybe..." the incubus stepped closer, letting the fabric slip off his shoulders to expose the bare skin underneath. "You'd like to help yourself to _me_ instead?"

The leader was greeted to a bag unceremoniously shoved into his face instead.

“I brought leftover cake from work.” Saihara stated simply. Ouma’s attention immediately went towards the bag, grabbing the sides as his wings flapped excitedly.

“I love you, Saihara-chan!!” he squealed. The detective choked, a blush on his face.

“D-don’t say things like that so suddenly!” he sputtered, as Ouma giggled with a teasing look.

“Oh, but it’s true! I _loooove_ you, my beloved Saihara-chan! You’re such a caring flatmate, bringing me such delicious treats!” Saihara gave a sigh, opting to ignore the phrasing, and instead decided to stare at his wings.

“So, uh.. Ouma-kun? About your wings…” he started. They were fluttering excitedly, and Saihara couldn’t help but note how cute it was... Actually, no, Saihara. Don’t.

“What about them? Are they too small for you?” the incubus huffed. “Size isn’t all that matters you know!”

“No, I mean, can you like… fly with them or something?” Ouma blinked before grinning, puffing his chest out proudly. Saihara had to act fast to put the shirt on his small body properly before he saw something he didn’t want to see.

“I sure can! I’m the strongest flier there is!” the leader boasted.

“I feel like that’s a lie.. Your wings are small, even for your height. It’s biologically impossible.” Ouma pouted, before spinning on his heel, his tail flicking sharply and before the detective knew it, the tip of the leader’s tail was swatting in front of Saihara’s face in annoyance.

“I take what I said back, I don’t love you! Saying such hurtful things to me!” he looked over his shoulder with a huff. “I’ll prove it’s not a lie tomorrow, just you wait!” he strutted out the room and slammed the door behind him. After a moment of stunned, awkward silence, Ouma reappeared to properly take the bag of cake, _then_ slamming the door behind him.

* * *

 

Nightfall. Ouma was situated on the roof, chomping on the cake with an angry flush on his face. If there was one thing that set him off, it was mentioning the size of his wings. He was a late bloomer, so what? That would be fixed later; for now he was focused on his current dilemma.  He swallowed the rest of his food before he rose to his feet, wings flapping slightly. Whether or not he succeeded, he could pass off his whole behavior as a lie anyways. It’d bit his little secret! After all, what could go wrong?

Ouma took a deep breath as he let his wings flap ever so slowly, before letting them swing down, his body lifting up into the air. He grinned giddily as he leaned forward, gliding out and away from the flat. His face relaxed into a content smile as the cool night air breezed through his hair. The moment of bliss was cut short as he decided to land in a nearby tree.

Unfortunately, said tree was well away from his line of flight, so one messy turn later, he found himself crashing against a branch, tumbling all the way down and onto the ground below.

“Gh…” Ouma winced as he pulled himself into a sitting position gingerly, pain seeping through his body. He ran a hand through his messy hair, a few leaves and twigs falling out as he let a displeased snort. That certainly could’ve gone better. He stretched his wings slightly before sucking in a breath in pain. He could feel a bad cut around the base of his wing and the pain coursed through his body like lightning. At least he didn’t _tear_ his wing, he had no idea what he’d do if that were to happen! He decided to rest for a little bit, maybe the feeling will dull away enough to let him return home.

He was torn from his thoughts as a quiet noise broke the silence. His head snapped up slightly, looking around to detect the source of the sound. A bush nearby shook, the noise repeating itself. Ouma decided to ignore the pain and crawled closer to the bush before pulling the branches apart. He gasped slightly at the sight, eyes sparkling a tad before he reached into the bush, pulling out a small bundle of fur. At least that’s what he guessed it was; the fur was terribly dirty, mud and foliage caked into it in clumps. It felt light, almost too light for its size. He cooed quietly, feeling the furball shiver and mewl once more.

“Shh… It’s ok, I’ve gotcha.” He murmured with a gentle smile. Bracing himself, he pulled himself to his feet, scurrying home as fast as he could.

* * *

 

Luckily for Ouma, Saihara had already turned in for the night. So even with him carefully picking his way into the house, he drew no attention. After properly locking up the house, the furball was the first to get cleaned up. He moved to the bathroom in his room and grabbed the soap and ran the showerhead, carefully scrubbing the dirt and nature away and occasionally petting and whispering gentle words to the shivering lump. The furball did put up quite the fight; adding additional injuries to his hands and arms with small teeth and claws. Regardless, he was successful in his mission and leaned back to admire his work. A small kitten, fur now pure white with a few dark patches alongside one side of its nose and the top of the head. He wrapped the kitten up in a fluffy blanket and moved it to his bed, closing the door and locking it.

“Now,” he turned to the cat. “I’m gonna go clean myself up and we’ll get your something to eat, ok?” he gently tapped the cat’s nose before disappearing into the shower. He had to be careful, his wounds screaming in protest at the warm water cascading down his body. Once he successfully cleaned up the dirt and excess blood, he made quick work of drying himself off and dressing his wounds. He hummed contently as he stepped out of the steamed bathroom in a fresh fluffy pj set and found the cat fast asleep on his pillow. He couldn’t stop the silly grin on his face before he unlocked the door, slipping out of the room and down to the kitchen.

 _‘Hmm, what can a cat eat?’_ Ouma thought to himself as he scouted the fridge. Eventually, he settled on a carton of eggs, cooking a few up and praying Saihara wouldn’t wake up from the smell. As soon as the food was done, he sloppily transferred them to the bowl and cleaned up his mess before running back to his room. When he opened his door, he was greeted to the small fluff sitting on the floor, mewling quietly.

“Oh. Hey there.” He chuckled quietly as he shut the door. He moved to his bed and set the bowl down on the floor next to it, the kitten diving for the food and chomping down enthusiastically. Ouma sat on the bed, legs crossed and head in his hands. So he has a cat now. That was well ok with him, but how was he gonna mention this to Saihara? The cat definitely needed food and a place to use the bathroom, and toys among other things. Maybe he could hide it, continue feeding it eggs.

Actually no. Ouma frowned to himself. That’s not good for the cat. He huffed slightly as his body slowly became sore, opting to lay on his stomach. He’d have to figure out what to do tomorrow. For now, he was tired. He slowly drifted in and out of consciousness before feelings something soft press into his side, a soft vibration. He tilted his head ever so slightly and chuckled, his good wing stretching out to cover the kitten.

“Mhhh, g’night, kitty.” He murmured quietly before drifting off to sleep.

* * *

 

Morning came.

Saihara woke up to the faint smell of cooked eggs and started awake. Did Ouma wake up early? He moved downwards to the kitchen and noticed the pan in the dish rack that he could’ve sworn wasn’t there the night before. He wrinkled his nose slightly before walking up to the incubus’s room, knocking on the door.

“Ouma-kun?” No response. He knocked once more. “Ouma-kun, are you in there?” Still silence. His face flushed slightly as he braced himself, opening the door slightly. He saw the leader on the bed, knocked out and snoring ever so slightly. He looked so content and peaceful. It was honestly kinda adorable…

Saihara shook his head clear of his thought before his eyes rested on the bowl on the floor, egg residue on the inside of the bowl in spots. He walked over and picked up the bowl, quietly making his way out. He’d have to question what the hell Ouma was doing last night. Did he get some kinda egg craving? That’d be fine, but why was it on the floor?? He froze in his tracks as he realized, as he passed the sleeping incubus, he thought he caught a glimpse of a furry tail under his wing. He turned back and went into the room again, shaking the leader’s shoulder. He didn’t expect him to shoot up with a pained yell, so he startled back.

“O-Ouma-kun, are you ok?” he started before his eyes flicked down. He saw the small kitten, stretching its paws with a long yawn. Ouma winced as he sat up and huffed. The detective turned his attention back, asking once more, “What happened last night?”

“Hm?” the incubus looked between his flatmate and the cat before grinning. “I decided to take a walk outside and ended up saving a kitten from a pack of vicious dogs!” he didn’t need to know he tried and failed at flying. “Can we keep it, by the way?”

“I—“ Saihara sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose. “Ouma-kun, I get it, but do you realize how much taking care of a cat costs? The food, the vet visits, any of that?” he scolded, crossing his arms. Ouma’s eyes watered as he gathered the ball of fluff in his arms.

“Please, Saihara-chan? Do you really want this dear to go back out onto the cold, hard, streets? At the mercy of dogs and bad people?? Are you really that heartless??”

Saihara sputtered before speaking, “No, absolutely not! I’m just saying, you can’t just pick up a cat off the street without a plan to care for it.” He looked down before sighing. “Alright. How about this?”

Ouma sat up, surprisingly alert. The detective continued. “You can keep the cat, but you need to pitch in financially as well. And by that, I mean you need to find a job as well. We’re lucky the college pays for our flat, but my job just gives me enough for food and hygiene.”

The leader’s eyes sparkled before he began to nod eagerly.

“I take back what I said yesterday! I love you, Saihara-chan!!” he squealed before holding up the cat. “I’m gonna name this darling little lady Panta-chan!”

“P-Panta—“ Saihara started before stopping himself. He found the cat, he cared for her, and pretty much threatened to guilt trip the hell out of him to keep her. He supposed the incubus could have this. “Wait, how do you know it’s a girl?”

“Uh, duh?” he turned Panta around. “You have eyes, Saihara-chan! You can clearly see that she doesn’t have a dick!” Saihara paled when he realized the implications that reveal brought up.

“Uh, noted. Let’s save for a vet visit asap.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> have you noticed a trend with ouma yet? :3c  
> also hurry before you have a bunch of panta jrs to keep track of boys-


	6. Service With a Smile

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> OK BC I LITERALLY LOST TRACK OF TIME i decided christmas will come early  
> ill update this fic everyday until christmas! and then christmas will have a three parter  
> anyway ouma has a job now

"Panta-chaaaaan~!" Ouma grinned as he held the kitten up above him. He brought her down closely, snickering gently as she laid a paw on his nose. "Who's a good kitty? Whooooo's a good kitty?"

"She's not a dog, Ouma-kun." Saihara quirked a brow, a small smile on his face at the scene. He had to admit, he was growing attached to the kitten himself. The incubus sat up and cradled the bundle of fur gently.

"I know that! She’s better than dogs!" A lie, of course, but he still had a bias the moment he found her. He looked down to the kitten and waved his tail at Panta, causing her to perk up and start batting at the heart-shaped tip playfully. Saihara stole a glance at the clock before getting up, stretching the tension in his body away.

“I have to go to work for a few hours. Think you can hunt for a job in the meanwhile?" the detective asked. Ouma gave a challenging snort.

“I can do one better and _nail_ a job, Saihara-chan!" he grinned, setting the kitten on the floor. She wasted no time continuing to play with Ouma's tail. Saihara blinked before sighing, making his way to the door.

"Just make sure you hide your wings and stuff before you leave the house." The leader chirped a 'Yes, Master!', the little shit, and Saihara bolted out the house. Once he knew he was alone he huffed loudly.

"Panta-chan, I can't hide my wings because of that stupid injury!" he frowned, crossing his arms. _'On that note,'_ he absentmindedly thought. _'I should probably change the bandages now...'_ He made his way to the bathroom, discarding his clothes to reclean and dress his wound. The other injuries he's sustained healed rather nicely; it was that gash next to his wing that got him worried. As he wrapped the bandage, he paused before carefully folding his wings against his back, wrapping them as well. It was a mercifully easy process; a plus to having smaller than average wings, he supposed. He combed his hair back and into a braid, shuffling to the closet and picking out a nice looking suit. He turned to Panta, who had climbed on the bed and curled up on the shirt he swore he let fall to the floor.

"How do I look?" he grinned, striking a pose. The kitten blinked at him slowly before lowering her head with a quiet purr. She digs it. He strided over to the sleepy cat and planted a small kiss on the top of her head. "Wish me luck, Panta-chan! I'll leave you some eggs in your bowl." Panta simply licked his nose in response and he was making his way out into the city.

* * *

 

Ouma scanned the streets as he made his way through the city. All of the stores he passed by so far were absolutely _boring_. As much as he loved cute clothes, he didn’t have the patience to deal with humans on that level. He froze in his tracks when he saw a particular building with a sign.

**_Grand Opening Coming Soon! Currently Hiring Playful and Friendly Faces_ **

He was a playful and friendly face! He straightened his tie before he made his way into the building, a small pop in his step. He was greeted to a young woman in a rather cute dress, hair tied up in a neat little bun.

"Oh, hello there!" she smiled brightly before blinking at the male. "Can I help you? We’re not officially open till later today."

"Why yes!" Ouma smiled lightly. "I saw you were hiring and was wondering if it’s too late!" The woman sputtered slightly.

"Oh! Um, well... There is a position left, but... I’m not sure it’s quite fit for someone like you, sir, no offense." She gave a small smile.

“ _Pleease_ , ma'am?" Ouma frowned, batting his eyelashes cutely. "I'm fine with anything, if it means I can provide at home! I promise you won’t regret it." He stared deep into her eyes, causing her to blush.

"O-oh... umm.." she stammered. Slowly but surely, she was finding herself lost. "As.. Long as you don’t mind the uniform…"

Ouma straightened up, grinning brightly.

"Thank you so much, ma'am! And don’t worry, I’ll wear pretty much anything!"

* * *

 

"A maid cafe?" Saihara blinked as he grabbed his belongings and turned to his friend and classmate, Kaito Momota.

"Yeah! It just opened and I was wondering if you wanted to check it out with me! For science, of course."

"Uh...huh." Saihara quirked a brow. "Even if I say no, you'll drag me anyways, so why not?" The astronaut let out a loud cheer before practically dragging the poor detective outside. It didn't take long for them to approach the building in question, a small, cozy looking café of sorts. Saihara... honestly expected worse. All he knew is that as soon as they stepped into the cafe, there would be a cute girl greeting them.

Or so they thought. Once they made their way inside, someone did come to greet them.

"Welcome home, Master~!" Ouma purred as he approached the two. Saihara nearly choked, face a bright red as he stared at the leader, who was dressed in a frilly maid outfit. There was a slight sway in his hips as he walked, tail swinging behind him rhythmically. His eyes were completely trained on the detective. The sight was almost hypnotizing to the detective, subconsciously raking his eyes over the smaller male’s frame before he quickly came to his senses, realizing---

“O-Ouma-kun!” Saihara moved quickly to whisper a near hiss at him. “What are you doing, I told you to hide your wings—“ he paused before he looked around at the other employees at work. They all had some magical accessory similar to his own. Catgirls and simple demons among some.

“It was my idea! I can let my wings heal while I’m at work!” he chimed before raising his voice. “So, will that be a table for two?” he offered. Saihara turned back to the astronaunt, who’s jaw was struggling to work.

“Ah… yes.” The detective covered. Ouma quickly seated them and handed them their menus.

“If you need anything at all, don’t hesitate to ring the bell.” The incubus winked. Kaito had the bell in his hands, ringing it obnoxiously.

“Can I have a different server, please?”

“That’s fine! I’ll direct you to another table.” Ouma grinned as he escorted Kaito away. Saihara looked at the two tiredly, head in his hand. He felt like coming here was a bad idea, yet he was ok with it? Ouma did get a job, so he could pitch in. He was torn from his thoughts as the incubus bounced back, tilting his head slightly. He was clearly playing up the cutesy part of his personality.

“So, have you decided on your order, Master?” he cooed, a sparkle in his eye. Saihara’s face flushed once more before he ducked his head into the menu.

“A-a um, black coffee?” he stammered. Ouma nodded, taking down his order before walking off. The detective had to will himself to not watch his tail wave around in the meanwhile. After what felt like an eternity of waiting, the incubus came back with his order.

“Here you go!” he held out the drink with a wink, a finger to his lips. “I’ve cast a spell on it so it tastes extra special!” Saihara took it with hesitation. Could incubi actually do such a thing? As if reading his thoughts, Ouma began to giggle. “It’s a lie, Master! It was simply brewed with a lot of love!”

The detective eyed the drink carefully before taking a quick sip, perking up at the taste. “Wow, it’s actually really good..!” he complimented with a small smile as he continued to drink, the incubus grinning brightly. Half a cup and a sudden performance from the other employees later, Ouma was off his first shift, and Saihara had paid for his drink. He had noted that his friend had left early, probably because he didn’t appreciate what he was first greeted to.

“So. You’re gonna stay here?” Saihara looked down at the incubus skipping behind him.

“Yep! The clothes are cute, the manager’s awesome, and I get to care for my darling Panta-chan!” he chimed.

“Well, at least you like it.” Saihara chuckled quietly. “On that note, how about we swing by the pet store and get her proper food and toys?”

Saihara quickly found himself chasing after the incubus through the busy streets, who was chattering excitedly on wanting to buy only the premium toys and food for his Panta.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> rip the ending dfjksdf


	7. Giving Into Temptation

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i figured out a chapter name  
> also bumped up the rating bc im an idiot

“Alright, we have a special project to do today!” the professor clapped his hands together. “Thoroughout the campus, there are badges hidden.” He held up two pins, a gold one with a bear etched into it and a silver one with a rabbit. “I’ll pair you into groups of two and hand you a paper with a riddle to solve. If you solve the riddle correctly, then the answer is where one of the pins are hidden.” After a brief explanation, he then began to pair the class up into twos. Saihara smiled slightly, his partner being Akamatsu. Ouma’s on the other hand…

“Oh, what?!” Iruma barked. “You mean you’re pairing me with that limp-dicked abortion?!” she jabbed her finger in the leader’s direction. Ouma stuck his tongue out, equally displeased.

“I know, right? Teach, can you please switch my partner? I don’t wanna work with some idiotic whore!”

The professor sighed and he rubbed his temples.

“This is an exercise on cooperation. If anything, you two need it more than anyone in this entire class. So unless you wanna fail, I suggest you don’t complain.”

“Good! Fail me then!” the incubus huffed, crossing his arms. Saihara cleared his throat.

“I’ll lock you out the house if you don’t cooperate.” He stated. Ouma gasped in shock before bursting into tears.

“How could you say something so mean in front of everyone?!” he wailed.

“How about this; I’ll let you buy _one_ premium cat toy for Panta.” Ouma’s tears stopped immediately.

“Ok! Only for Panta-chan!” he grinned. Miu snorted.

“Yeah, sure! You probably wanna be in the presence of my great and powerful tits after all!”

“Shut it, you noisy skank.” Ouma inwardly cringed as he felt that familiar scent cross his nose. This was gonna be a long day…

* * *

 

Ouma scanned the words on the paper he was given. A simple riddle.

  
_A place where messes are made, and mess cleaned, where you can make yourself fat to make yourself lean._

Oh wow, this was an easy one. It’s obviously—

“Hey, how long is it gonna take for you to figure it out, shota boy?” Miu snatched the paper from his hands. Ouma groaned, turning to her.

“I just finished reading the riddle, ya know.” He rose a brow. “Also, need I remind you I’m _older_ than you?” The inventor looked through the riddle, completely ignoring the incubus’s existence before cackling.

“Hah, this is an easy one! It’s obviously a strip club!” she grinned. Ouma stared at her with a blank expression before taking back the paper.

“Holy shit, you’re a stupider bitch than I thought.” He snarked as he walked ahead. Miu squawked (at least he thought that’s what that was) before running after him.

“Who do you think you are, calling the outstanding Miu Iruma stupid?!” she growled as they entered the dining hall.

“Ah, but you don’t deny the bitch part.” He snickered. “Good to see you acknowledge it!” He spun on a heel before narrowing his eyes sharply, causing the girl to cower. “Now how about you _be_ a good little bitch and refrain from speaking without thinking, understand?” he hissed lowly. She gave a shaky nod and Ouma turned around once more to find the badge, pushing his thoughts out of his head. It’s like she _enjoyed_ being degraded, and it wasn’t helping his instincts at all. He quickly found the gold badge behind a few pots and pans and pocketed quickly. All they needed was the silver badge and he didn’t have to deal with her anymore for the rest of the day! That should be easy enough, right?

* * *

 

“So, tell me about Ouma-kun!” Akamatsu tried to probe a little. She and the detective were in the gardens, with the male carefully sifting the dirt near the flowers. The amount of focus he had on making sure the flowers weren’t ruined was endearing in a way. “You said something about a cat toy..?”

“Ah, yeah.” he murmured as he checked a different spot. “He found a stray kitten a little bit ago and has been taking care of her. Or rather, spoiling her.” The pianist smiled as she clapped her hands together.

“That’s so sweet! I’m sure she appreciates it.” Akamatsu looked up into the trees above them before gasping, shaking the detective’s shoulder as she pointed up to a birdhouse nestled among the branches. There was a glint of something silver inside. Saihara pulled himself into a kneeling position, locking his fingers together so the pianist could step on, letting herself be lifted into the tree. Saihara made sure that he kept his eyes glued to the flowers below.

“I suppose so. She certainly has a fondness for him, and vice versa.” He chuckled lightly. He thought back to the small kitten, who was practically glued to the incubus’s side since the day he took her in. It’s barely been two weeks and the pair were already inseparable. However there were a few times she’s made herself comfortable in the detective’s lap while he was enjoying his morning coffee. “I guess she likes me too, but nowhere near as much as she does him.”

“You’re not jealous, are you?” Akamatsu teased as she grabbed the silver badge from the birdhouse. She hopped onto the ground, allowing Saihara to finally lift his head.

“No, why would I be? Ouma-kun’s the one who rescued her so I expected her to like him more.”

“Pft, that’s not what I mean!” the girl giggled. “I mean are you jealous of him giving her more attention?”

Saihara paused, before his face flushed a slight pink shade.

“W-what, no! It’s honestly a refreshing change of pace..” he murmured quietly.

“Your blush says otherwise.” Akamatsu pointed a finger to his face, a teasing smile on her own. Saihara’s only response was to look away with a quiet huff.

“Akamatsu-san, I’m serious. I can’t count the times he’s tried to flirt with me on a daily basis.”

“Well it’s obvious he likes you!” _‘Or rather, he just sees me as food.’_ Saihara added in his head. “Honestly, it’s kinda cute seeing him tag along with you the few times I’ve seen you two together! I think you should go for it.”

“I, uh,” the detective stammered. “I don’t think it’s that easy.”

“Well, have you tried to at least befriend him?” Akamatsu offered with a slight tilt of the head. Saihara paused, pursing his lips. “Oh my god, you haven’t. C’mon, Saihara-kun! It’s been 3 months since you’ve met him and you haven’t even tried to get to know him?”

“I-I know him!” he defended. “I know he’s childish and he likes to flirt, and he… likes cats.”

“Pfff—“ Akamatsu nearly choked on a laugh. “C’mon, there has to be more to him than that.” She gently patted the detective’s shoulder. “Look, it’s almost time for the holidays. Maybe you can use the time to get to know him better so you can get him a gift?”

The detective paused before sighing, finally relenting. He knew this was a losing battle anyways. Besides, he did say to himself he’d try but honestly hadn’t made much progress.

“I… suppose.” Akamatsu grinned, clearly proud of her friend.

“Great! Now let’s get these badges to the professor!”

* * *

 

Ouma was practically speedwalking, biting his lip in a mix of frustration and an attempt to hang on to what little self-control he had left. Having to deal with Iruma and that damn tempting scent. He shook his head before looking at the door in front of him, marked gym, before looking back at the paper.

_This is a place you can hoop and holler but if you want one in your home, you may have to pay top dollar._

He opened the doors and made his way inside, taking deep breaths to calm down his subtle trembling. He just had to find that damn badge, then he could finally breathe...

Then Iruma opened her mouth for the umpteenth time that day.

“What’re you slowing down for, shrimp dick? Don’t tell me you’re out of steam already!”

The incubus’s head snapped up to stare her down, eyes turned to slits. Iruma squeaked in surprise, clearly not expecting it.

“W-what the fuck’s with your eyes-?!” she stammered out. Ouma paused before taking a deep breath.

“Look, Iruma-chan, are you really that desperate?” he took a step forward for every back step she took.

“What do you mean?” she spat, trying to recover from her initial shock. “I’m not desperate for anything!” A misstep on her part, and she fell back against the bleachers, the incubus wasting no time looming over her and gripping her shoulders, staring deep into her eyes.

“That’s bullshit and you know it, you fucking whore.” He could feel her trembling slightly, a flash of excitement in her eyes. He was practically fuzzed-headed from the inventor’s scent. He wanted Saihara so badly and without a doubt, but a quick snack couldn’t hurt… Could it? "It's clear you're in need of attention, so I _suppose_ I can give you what you want."

Ouma leaned closed to Iruma’s neck and got a needy whimper in response, Iruma slightly leaning up into his body. He parted his lips slightly, fangs bare and ready to sink into her neck, before the door banged open. The incubus shot himself away and ungracefully landed on his rear. Iruma, in the meanwhile, sat herself up on shaky arms and squeezed her legs together, mind swimming.

“Oh my, oh my! I hope I didn’t interrupt anything~!” Ouma paled slightly as he looked at the figure at the door.

Sure enough, Angie was there, hands behind her back with her trademark smile on her lips.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thanks angie this almost turned het  
> also rip ouma next chapters gonna be Hell


	8. Repent, Motherfucker!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> lessgOOOOO (also the chapter titles a pas reference so fkdk)

After a deafening silence, Ouma was the first to speak up.

"No, actually!" he smiled an empty smile. On one hand he was glad she showed up before he did anything. He could continue saving himself for Saihara! On the other hand...

"Miu, I passed by Kiibo earlier; he said he was looking for you for a quick tune up?" Angie put a hand to her cheek in wonder, tilting her head. Miu quickly straightened up and rose to her feet.

"Hahah, already? I knew he couldn't resist my gorgeous looks!" she cackled, only to pipe down when she caught the incubus glaring at her. His look said it all; she wasn’t to breathe a _word_ of what happened. She ducked out of the gym while Angie waved goodbye. Once the door was shut, she turned to the leader, who was getting up and dusting himself off.

"I know who you are, Kokichi~." She sang. Ouma wrinkled his nose with a huff.

“I'd be surprised if you _didn’t_. I’m your classmate, Angie-chan."

"No no, I mean.." her smile grew wider, a chill running down his spine. “I know _who_ you are. I knew the moment I touched your hands!"

Ouma swore to himself. If she knew, then that meant...

"Look, Angie-chan, I haven't even fed on anyone yet!" There was no point lying, it'd make him look like a bigger fool. "You can't do anything if I haven’t!"

"Mhh, true.." she tapped the tip of her paint brush against her chin. "But you're a special case! After all, there aren’t many incubi like you!"

“If you know me, then you know getting rid of me's a bad idea!" Ouma scoffed. "Would you _really_ risk it?"

"I dunno, I dunno! Would I? But then again..."

The incubus nearly shrieked in surprise as he narrowly hopped out of the way of a flash of light. He tumbled back before finding his footing while using the wall next to him as support. His eyes followed the trail of light, reminiscent of a burning yellow whip before looking up at the artist. A pair of wings had rested on her back, a soft yet intense shade of red with quick flickers of fire dancing among them. Above her head rested a halo he knew would straight up kill him if he made contact.

Angie held up her paintbrush, now the handle to her whip and smiled an innocent smile.

"Atua knows best, after all!"

* * *

 

It was the end of the day. Saihara fidgeted slightly in his seat. He hasn’t seen Ouma or Iruma since the assignment, and it had him in edge. He was jolted from his thoughts when he felt a hand on his shoulder.

"Hey, don’t worry so much, Saihara-kun!" Akamatsu smiled at him. "He got paired with Iruma-chan, she's probably dragging him all across campus."

Saihara let out a gentle chuckle, the thought of Ouma's face throughout it all amusing.

"I suppose you're right.." he slung his bag over his shoulder as he got up. “They really should hurry up, though before they fail.."

Since the two were finished with their assignment, they were allowed to leave. However as soon as Saihara stepped outside the classroom he was suddenly suffocated. He jerked back with a screech, the culprit squeaking in return.

"W-watch it, Shithara!" Oh god, it was Iruma. "You can't just cop a feel of my tits like that!"

"--Iruma-san!" Saihara quickly grabbed the inventor's shoulders, causing her to crumple up once more. "Why isn’t Ouma-kun with you?!"

"I-I..." she bit her lip, making the detective blink in confusion. "He's uh, with Angie… She told me to find Kiibo since he needed my genius once more."

Saihara's hands slipped to his sides, his eyes widening.

"Iruma-san... Where were you both last?"

"T-the gym...?" The girls both found themselves calling out after Saihara, who had made a beeline to the gym.

"Jeez, what the fuck's his deal?" Iruma snorted in confused. Akamatsu simply shrugged, worried about her friend.

Once Saihara made it to the gym, he wasted no time kicking the door down. The sight that greeted him cause his heart to plummet to his feet. There were light yellow fires burning amongst the bleachers equipment, and parts of the floor. Despite it, there wasn't any smoke. The flames felt warm and welcoming, but it did nothing to ease the chill running through his veins. In the center of the large space was a bandage wrap, old blood stains decorating it conservatively. The fires on the wrap burned the brightest amongst the blood stains.

"K...Kokichi...?" Saihara stammered to himself. He was too late. He lost his flatmate. Right when he resolved to at least try to understand him. He was a fool, a fucking fool—

**_BAM!!_ **

The detective jolted, running outside of the gym to look at the window nearby. He could see bright flashes of light, students running away in panic. The dots connected in his head before..

 _"Kokichi!!"_ Saihara ran to the source of the noises and lights, praying that he'd make it in time.

* * *

 

The incubus heaved as quietly as he could, curling into a tight ball as he hid. His constant running found him in the library, the bandage he was wearing serving as a decoy. His wings flexed slowly. The pain was barely there, but maybe that's because he was feeling pain in other places where the angel successfully struck him.

"Come out, come out, Kokichi! I know you're in here!" the incubus sucked in a quick breath, his heartbeat quickening as he heard Angie. Judging by her voice, she was at the entrance and he was towards the very back in the mystery novels section. The library was like a maze, so maybe he could sneak around the isles and outside…

 _Or_ he could forget that unlike him, she could fly so it didn’t take her long to perch on one of the bookshelves and swing her whip down at him. Ouma yelped as he ducked, the whip scoring the books where he used to be. He scrambled off on all fours before managing to break out into a run, Angie following behind from atop the shelves. Clearly, outrunning her was becoming that more of a non option, so he opted to play dirty. With the strength he could muster, he slammed his body into the bookshelf she was on, causing the angel and the shelf itself to fall over and bury her in books. Ouma straightened up, catching his breath as he began to make his way out of the library. Once he reached the door, however, he let out a loud cry of pain, feeling something hot wrap around his ankle and tug him violently to the ground.

"That was a close one!" Angie chimed as she freed herself from the large pile of books. "You almost got away for a second there!"

The incubus tried to tug his foot away, only to wince at the growing pain as he was dragged towards the angel. Well, this was it. He was gonna die weak, mateless and painfully. He didn’t get a chance to properly befriend his beloved Saihara. He didn’t even get a chance to say goodbye to Panta! And if he died, then it'd be hell... Ouma squeezed his eyes shut, bracing himself for the worst when he heard the door in front of him burst open.

"Angie-san, don’t!" the incubus looked up to see the detective himself, panting as if he ran a marathon. He certainly would've denied the color to his cheeks; he wasn’t embarrassed to be seen like this, and he _certainly_ wasn’t ecstatic to see him!

"Oh, hello, Shuichi!" Angie waved with her free hand. “I'm sorry, but it's my job to take care of demons that I find on earth! It’s Atua's commands, after all!"

”Angie-san, _please._ " The detective begged. "He hasn’t done anything worth dying over! I mean he can be aggrivating--"

"Wow, thanks."

"—but he's still my flatmate. Besides, you don’t think it won’t be noticed when he's gone, as well as me being a witness?"

Angie paused, tilting her head.

"Umm, well, you're a _human_. It's not like it’ll be that easy to solve since as far as humans are concerned, we only exist in legend!"

"Please, just... just let him go. I promise you I won’t let him get into any trouble." Saihara removed his hat, holding it close to his chest and he bowed as far as he could. The angel stayed quiet before finally shrugging, the whip turning back into a simple paintbrush.

"Well, I suppose just this once! But only because you're involved, Shuichi! I won’t let him off easy next time!" With that, the artist left. Ouma pulled himself into a sitting position, rubbing his ankle gingerly.

"Uh, thanks for that I guess." The incubus mumbled, clearly embarrassed. However, it quickly turned into excitement as he threw his arms around the detective.

"I knew it, I knew you loved m after all!" he laughed. The detective simply wrapped his arms around the smaller boy, squeezing tightly while being mindful of the injury. "Saihara-chan..?"

“I'm sorry I didn’t get here sooner." He murmured. After what felt like forever, Saihara let go, covering his flushed face with his hat. "Um, anyway, lets hurry and get out of here. I still have to take you to get that cat toy."

* * *

 

The detective stared at the incubus who was snoring away on the couch, cat toy in hand. He caught a glimpse of his back and saw the wound was scabbed, enough so that if anything happened, it wouldn't reopen. That was a relief. He checked for more wounds, but found they have disappeared as well. It was probably like with his hands in that when removed from holy objects, his body would heal. He blinked once he saw Panta join her friend on the couch, curling up on the area between his wings and laughed quietly to himself.

It was almost the holidays, wasn’t it. He would do his best to understand Ouma better. Things he himself would like, that he was more than some creature searching for food.

Maybe they could grow to be good friends after all.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i thought this was a comedy


	9. Do You Wanna Build a Snowdiiiiick?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> it crimus  
> merr  
> also fun fact this was originally a oneshot i started that was gonna kick off some side stories but i decided to finish it and add it to the main story!

Saihara hummed as he stared at the scenery outside his window. Snow was a rather common sight in his area, so life would go about its usual business. He was off that day, so he spent it in his little nook, curled up in a blanket with a cup of warm coffee and the perfect view of the neighborhood. It was a perfect, calm morning.

Until a loud squeal echoed through the house.

The detective barely flinched, sipping his coffee as he heard the buzzing of wings grow louder until the culprit barreled into the room.

"Saihara-chan!!" Ouma grinned brightly as his wings flapped, keeping him hovering ever so slightly above the floor. "It's snowing!"

"Yes, Ouma-kun, I can see that." Saihara had a bemused smile on his face, noting the incubus's injury has finally healed. "Have you never seem snow before?"

Ouma had finally calmed down, wings slowing to a halt as his feet touched the ground.

"Not really? It's very hot where I lived, so snow was impossible! Well except in one place but I'm not really allowed there." Ouma shrugged. Saihara raised a brow curiously. Where exactly did Ouma come from? Part of him wants to believe Hell because he's a demon, but.. Snow? In Hell? He'd ask another day, right now he had to focus on the vibrating purple boy in front of him.

"Let's go outside, Saihara-chan! Please, please, pleeeeeaaaaaasee?" he hopped.

"Ouma-kun, how old _are_ you?"

"A thousand!"

"Stop lying."

"Fine. But it's my first time seeing snow!" he stared with large purple eyes, tears gathering in the corners. "You wouldn't ruin this for me, would you...?"

Saihara sucked in a breath. He didn’t want his flatmate to cry, but he _also_ didn’t want to go outside... The detective relented.

"Alright. But just for a little while." Ouma let out a loud cheer, startling the bundle of fluff that was curled up on the couch. The leader made his way over and scooped her up, cooing apologies as he raced to the door. Saihara immediately gave chase after carefully setting down his coffee. "You are not going out there in your pajamas--!"

* * *

 

Panta's eyes focused intensely on each falling snowflake with razor sharp precision, occasionally lashing her front paws out to catch the flakes. Any she'd miss she would attempt to dig up from the snow, causing her small body to be partially buried. Ouma had flopped down beside her, wings fanning out as he moved his legs with a laugh.

"Hey, Saihara-chan! Think I can make a snow demon like this?" he looked up at the detective who was seated on the porch, head in his hands.

"Stop moving your legs, you might turn it into some angel-demon hybrid." Saihara joked. Ouma sat up with a pout, running his hands through the snow, erasing his work.

"Yeah, don’t need any cursed shit here. Anyway, come join us already! We could make the biggest snowman in the area-- _mmmph-!_ " the incubus's words were cut off when Panta suddenly appeared on the back of his head, the force sending him face first into the snow below. Saihara paused, letting the scene sit in his head before bursting out laughing.

"Why not ask Panta-chan? She seems to be on board with that idea!" he managed to get out, rubbing the tears that had formed in the corners of his eyes.

"Panta-chaaaan!" Ouma rolled onto his back, staring at the cat on his chest with watery eyes. "How could you do such a thing to me?!" The kitten purred, licking his nose in apology. "Ok, I forgive you. But just this once!"

Once his laughter died down, Saihara made his way to the incubus, pulling him up to his feet and allowing the cat to perch on her friend's shoulder.

"Still up for that snowman?" the detective offered.

“I _was_ , but now I’m too cold! What a shame, I would've made the best snowman." Ouma shivered.

"How about we go back inside and fix something warm to drink, then? We can come back outside to make the snowman."

The incubus attached himself to his flatmate's arm in response, following him inside.

* * *

 

Later that night, the two were sitting on the couch, warm drinks in hand (Saihara had no idea how Ouma could inhale hot cocoa with _extra_ sugar) and watching tv. Their earlier attempts at making a perfect snowman ended in failure, although Ouma insisted it was because they couldn't stick snowboobs or snowdicks on it. It wasn't because it was lopsided or because Panta dug a tunnel through it at all! But that was in the past, right now the detective was watching that show Ouma was glued to with an unamused expression. He'd love this episode, the leader said. It was a mystery episode, he said.

"Ouma-kun, none of them took into account that her friends could've been framed." Saihara pointed out.

“Yeah, but they confessed to eating the cake!"

"On that note, why are still insistent on turning their entry in? That'd get them disqualified on the spot."

"Oh, boo and your logic." Ouma stuck his tongue out, grabbing the remote. "There's a better one if that's worth anything!"

Saihara murmured an 'If you say so..' as he gently scratched a sleeping Panta behind the ears.

As the tv ran, the detective became lost in his thoughts before he spoke up.

"What do you think about Christmas?" Ouma paused the tv to look at the other male.

"Y'mean that holiday where some weird old fat dude breaks into your house to leave stuff you wanted because he’s an omniscient stalker?"

Damn.

"Uh, sure. Though Santa doesn’t exist."

"I know!" the incubus laughed. "It's like a worldwide elaborate lie! A plus parenting am I right?" Saihara cleared his throat.

"Anyway, it’s probably your first Christmas here, so let’s prepare for it soon, alright? You're fine with decorating aren’t you?"

The incubus's eyes sparkled, wings buzzing behind him in turn.

"Oh, I would love to spend time decorating with my beloved Saihara-chan!" he grinned brightly. Saihara returned the smile with his own small, slightly awkward one.

"Great. We can start planning for it tomorrow." Ouma nodded, unpausing the tv to let the episode run. They sat in an oddly comfortable silence before the incubus spoke up.

"So, who's your favorite so far? I bet it’s Twilight."

"Be quiet."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry if this is a bit shorter than usual! expect the christmas special tomorrow!♡♡


	10. The Thirstiest Time of the Year

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> alright christmas special time! ill update this until all parts are up leSSGO

_A young boy was sitting on the couch, gold eyes wide with wonder as he clutched a magnifying glass in his tiny hands. He was watching mystery shows as usual, kicking his feet as he tried to piece the case together himself. He made a game of it, rewarding himself with candy when he solved it correctly, and asking his uncle for assistance when he got it wrong. Sleuthing was in his blood, despite his parents deviating to pursue the big screen. Funnily enough, their movies still dabbled in thrilling mysteries as well, so maybe they didn’t deviate as far as they thought. He remembered the last instance of contact he got from his parents. When he was in middle school, on his 13 th birthday, he received a present from his estranged parents._

_A simple black hat with three stripes and a star on the side. From the way it felt under his fingers, it was clearly handmade. It was rather big on his head, but he figured he'd grow into it eventually._

_He promised to take good care of that hat and become a detective worthy enough, in honor of their memory._

* * *

 

"Good morning, Saihara-chan~. Are you ready to open your present yet?" The detective in question was awoken to Ouma straddling his waist, wearing a Christmas themed red babydoll, complete with thighhighs and long sleeved fingerless lingerie gloves and topped with a thin red velvet choker, a bow decoration on its side. At this rate, Saihara didn't even bother to question where he even got that ensemble. Instead, he half heartedly threw a pillow in front of the incubus's face.

"It's too cold for that, Ouma-kun. Get properly dressed so we can hit the stores."

"Fiiiiine. But I’m stealing your pillow!" Ouma stuck his tongue out as he hugged the pillow, escaping to his room. The detective sat up in his best, stretching the sleep out of his body as the dream filled in the gaps of his head. He quickly pushed the dream to the back of his mind, getting out of bed and going towards the bathroom to wash up. He would mourn later. Right now, he had to get ready for the holiday rush. With his cap nestled on his head, he made his way downstairs to see his flatmate already dressed and at the door, hugging and nuzzling his cat.

"We'll be back soon, ok? I made triple sure you have everything you need! Don’t poop on the couch and I’ll come back with some cat treats!" he tapped on the cat's nose, who licked his finger and purred in return before being set down and allowed to wander off into the flat.

"You really love Panta-chan, don’t you?" Saihara chuckled.

"Of course I do! She’s my baby. Now hurry up, I have cat treats to get!"

"And decorations." The detective pointed out as he followed the smaller male outside.

* * *

 

Saihara had never regretting waiting so late to get decorations until today. It was the equivalent of finding a needle in a haystack, having to go through multiple stores and crowds, only to grab a small tree, a boxful of assorted ornaments and tinsel. It wasn’t much and the tree was gonna look tacky as hell, but y’know what? He could live with that, he supposed.

Once he set the tree up properly, he began to decorate the room with the tinsel, stopping to drag Ouma, who had made himself comfortable on the couch, to his feet.

“You said you wanted to help decorate, so you’re helping.” The detective scolded. Ouma pouted, whining about how absolutely _mean_ Saihara was being before hopping along to add ornaments to the tree.

“Hey, Saihara-chan, did you know I’m actually an expert juggler?” he chimed as he began tossing along some of the glass ornaments like so.

“NO--!” the detective carefully yet quickly snatched the ornaments from the air. “They’re glass, please be careful with them.”

“Oh, c’mon, the house is p decked out with carpets.” Ouma huffed as he hung the decorations on the tree. Once they finished the tree, the incubus was back on the couch, fitting a red fluffy collar around Panta’s neck. Once he had her situated, he snickered, creeping up on the detective before hopping up to take his hat. Saihara whipped around in surprise, eyes wide.

“Ouma-kun, give that back!” he reached for the hat, only to miss as the incubus hopped back.

“No can do, Saihara-chan! You need a more festive hat!” he grinned as he ran off. The detective wasted no time giving chase, with the incubus using his smaller size to his advantage to escape when Saihara had him cornered.

The chase ended abruptly as the incubus’s foot was caught on the Christmas light’s cable left dangling from the tree, causing him to trip and crash into the tree. The tree fell from the weight, and the sound of breaking ornaments caused Saihara to screech to a halt, eyes wide.

“Ouma-kun, are you ok?!” he gasped. The leader huffed as he pulled himself free, dusting the broken ornament fragments from his sweater.

“Yeah, I’m fine. Uh..” he looked around himself and the tree before finding and pulling out Saihara’s hat, now torn with holes. “Oops.”

The detective paused as he stared at the hat before he felt his face heat up, the corner of his eyes being dotted with tears. He pulled the smaller male to his feet, snatching the hat from his grasp.

“Hey, it’s just a hat—“

“No, it’s not!” the incubus stiffened at the sudden snap. “Did it even cross your mind to simply ask me if you wanted me to not wear it?!”

Ouma stayed silent before murmuring a mechanical ‘I’m sorry.’

“Sorry can’t fix what you did, Ouma-kun. You need to realize your actions have consequences, and--” The detective felt his voice die in a tight lump in his throat as he held the hat against his chest, hands shaking. “I just… I can’t. I just can’t deal with you right now.”

Saihara dragged himself out of the room, slamming the door once he made his way into his bedroom and leaving a stunned Ouma behind.

* * *

 

Saihara sat on his bed, holding his hat tightly as a few silent sobs escaped his shaking frame. Ruined, absolutely ruined… Words couldn’t express how furious he was at his flatmate, and how casually he handled it. But the rational side of his head argued that Ouma didn’t know; the detective didn’t really talk about how much his hat meant to him, it could’ve very well have been an honest mistake.

The detective rubbed his eyes as he set his ruined hat on his nightstand carefully, taking a deep breath to calm himself down as he exited his room.

“I… Look, Ouma-kun, I’m sorry for yelling. I should’ve told you how much that hat means to me earlier—“ he paused as he took in the empty room, save for Panta sitting on the couch staring at him. “Ouma-kun?” he frowned, beginning to scurry around the flat, checking every room as realization began to dawn on him.

Ouma was nowhere to be found.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> oh shit


	11. The Thirstiest Time of the Year pt. 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> lets see how saihara handles this

Saihara weakly collapsed against the couch, running a hand through his hair. He fucked up. He shouldn’t have yelled. And now Ouma was gone. He tried to reassure himself, telling himself maybe he went outside to give him space? No, that was stupid. A soft mewl perked him from his thoughts and saw Panta rubbing against his leg, purring softly. A weak smile formed on his lips as he let the small kitten jump into his lap, petting her head gently. Right, he wasn’t gonna leave Panta behind either. He’d be back.

“I messed up, Panta-chan.” He muttered. “Ouma-kun might come back, but I don’t know how he’s gonna react after that…” The cat simply jumped down from his lap, moving to an unbroken ornament and pawed it closer to him with a small mewl. Saihara blinked, staring at the sight before perking up slightly. “Ah, right… It’s almost Christmas, isn’t it? I suppose I could get him a gift to make it up to him? And of course, talk to him about what happened.” He gently slapped his cheeks to focus before rising to his feet and rushing to his room. He zeroed in on his closet, grabbing a duffel bag and rushing to the front door.

“If I make it in time, perhaps the stores will still be open…!” Once he grabbed the doorknob, he paused at a loud meow. He looked down to see the small kitten attached to his leg, staring up at him with bright amber eyes. “…Ok.” he gave in, kneeling and opening the bag to let the kitten climb inside, zipping it up enough to hide her, but not completely to let her breathe. Saihara faintly realized that he was basically going to smuggle a pet into whatever store he would choose to go. Hopefully, this won’t bite him in the ass.

* * *

 

“Oh, Saihara-kun!” the detective perked up slightly as he looked up, noticing his best friend wave as she made her way to see him.

“Oh, hey, Akamatsu-san.” he smiled lightly. “How are your holidays so far?”

“Pretty good!” she grinned. “Amami-kun blew the whistle on me and I ended up having to play a bunch of songs on the piano for his little sisters. Or rather, Christmas songs. I can still hear Jingle Bells in my head. What about you? Have you been getting along with Ouma-kun? …Actually, where is your hat?” Saihara flinched before lowering his head.

“I, uh… He ripped my hat on accident and I yelled at him…” he muttered. “And he left before I could apologize. So I’m gonna go buy something to make up for it.”

“Aww, I see.” The pianist gave her friend a reassuring smile. “That’s sweet of you! I’m sure he’d appreciate anything you get him.”

“I hope so…” he smiled somberly before shaking his head. “A-anyways, I’m gonna go to the city real quick. Have a very happy holiday, Akamatsu-san.” He nodded his head as he ran off.

“Happy holidays to you too, Saihara-kun!” she waved, seeing him off.

* * *

 

Saihara hummed to himself as he walked through the crowded streets, opting to hug his bag to keep the cat inside from getting squished. Her small furry face was apparent from the opening the zipper provided and he couldn’t help but smile stupidly at her. God, why was she so cute.

“Hey, what do you think Ouma-kun likes?” he asked Panta, who only meowed in response. He adjusted the bag enough to let her small head completely peak out, watching her head shake. The detective stopped in his tracks, a sweet smell wafting about. Oh, of course!! Saihara ran to the source, opening the door after letting Panta hide once more.

“Welcome home, Maste—Oh, Saihara-kun!” a brunette girl perked up, smiling at him from her place at the counter.

“Happy Holidays, Chika-san.” The detective smiled, walking to the counter. “Have you seen Ouma-kun anywhere?” The woman paused, blinking before she looked down as if to search her memory.

“Well, no. I gave him the day off today, so I don’t know why he’d come here. I’m sorry, dear.” She smiled sympathetically.

“Oh, good.” Saihara breathed a sigh of relief before realizing and backtracking, a blush on his face. “I-I mean, can I get a chocolate cake? Maybe with a message on it or something, or can you not do that..?”

Chika giggled, a glint of knowingness in her eyes.

“Well, it’s Christmas. I suppose I can make an exception for my coworker’s flatmate!” she sang. She went to retrieve a personal cake and a bag of icing. “What do you want written on the cake?”

The detective blushed, looking around at the people occupying the café before motioning her to come closer, whispering his message in her ear. Chika paused before giggling quietly, nodding as she scribbled it down on the cake.

“Thank you so much.” Saihara blushed, handing her the money and taking the box the cake was packed in.

“Of course! And one more thing, if I may, Saihara-kun?” the male tilted his head before the girl continued. “You should go out more often like this. You look very handsome without your hat, if you don’t mind me saying!”

“I-I, ah…” he chuckled, clearly embarrassed. “Thank you, Chika-san. Happy Holidays.” He nodded his head as he quickly ducked out of the café.

* * *

 

Last stop, the clothes store. The mannequins in the window had caught his eye, he knew Ouma would like one of them. Or both. Honestly, who knows with that incubus anymore. He made his way into the store, scanning the inside carefully. It was packed to the brim with people, the tables and such an absolute mess. It’d take him forever to find that damn sweater. So he did what he thought was good and asked a nearby worker where the sweaters could be found. He was pointed in the right direction and he gave his thanks, hurrying in that direction. Luckily, he had found the sweater and checked the tag with a relieved smile. It was the right size as well… He quickly brought the sweater to the registers, paying for it and having it gift boxed and he couldn’t help but clap his hands together in relief. He gave his best wishes to the cashier, making his way to the front of the store with a small spring in his step.

Saihara then froze, as a shock of purple appeared in the corner of his eye.

“Ouma-kun?” he gasped as he whirled around, just barely catching the purple blob disappear into the crowd. “Ouma-kun, wait!!” he shouted, murmuring quiet apologies and excuses as he tried to speed through the crowd, being mindful of the fragile gifts he had. Right when he made considering progress to catch the other, his bag began to move violently. Eventually, Panta made her escape, causing the detective to nearly scream, diverting all his attention to the runaway cat. If he _lost_ her…

Saihara had completely forgotten about his manners, barreling through the crowd and trying his hardest to focus on the white fur, eventually failing as she successfully disappeared into the crowd.

The detective began to shake slightly, horror sinking in his gut.

He lost Panta.

He fucking lost his flatmate’s cat.

Ouma was gonna _kill_ him.

Maybe it was karma for yelling at him earlier? He made a quick mental note to hurry home as fast as he could to set his gifts down before running back out. Maybe it was a waste of time, but it’d give him more room to work with, and he was damn prepared to search the whole city if he had to.

For now, he had to force himself to leave the store, every step feeling like he was wearing lead on his feet instead of shoes.

* * *

 

As he made his way into the neighborhood, he started to wipe at his eyes before perking up, hearing a soft mewl behind him. He turned around quickly with wide eyes, a wave of relief washing over him as he saw Panta, padding towards him carefully and rubbing against his leg in apology, purring softly.

“O-oh, god…” he sank to his knees, putting the boxes down to hug the cat gently. “Please, don’t scare me like that again…” he begged quietly. Panta continued to purr, nuzzling the detective’s nose in an attempt to comfort him. She pulled her head back, allowing the detective to look as her closely. She had held a small plant in her mouth. Was it catnip? No, wait…. Saihara’s face flushed once he realized what the plant in her mouth actually was.

“Panta-chan, I...” he stammered, trying to find words and failing. “…I-I suppose I could work with that..?” he gently took the plant from the cat’s mouth, setting it on top of the boxes as he picked them up and rose to his feet, the kitten squirming into the bag in the meanwhile. “Well then, shall we go home? I think I’m done with going out like this for the next few weeks.” He chuckled softly, the cat meowing in agreement as he made his way back home.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> second base reached!


	12. The Thirstiest Time of the Year pt. 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i alternated between this and saiharas side ooooo  
> YES INDEEDY I DID IN FACT TRY TO WRITE SYNCHRONIZED CHAPTERS I HOPE I DID WELL

Ouma sat on the couch after he recovered from his shock, huffing slightly. He hasn’t seen Saihara that angry before. Even then, he had expected the detective to outright lose his cool and continue yelling, even disowning him as his flatmate. Somehow, his quieted reactions stung worse. He couldn’t help his wings drooping, worrying about how badly their relationship was messed up after this. Panta hopped next to him, rubbing under his arm in a comforting manner. The incubus smiled lightly, rubbing under her chin with a finger.

“Well, I fucked that up, Panta-chan.” He laughed bitterly. “Ahh, I bet my beloved Saihara-chan hates me now…” He put his head in his free hand, looking idly at the fallen tree. He stared at it for a moment before brightening up, wings flapping excitedly.

“Oh, I know! I can make it up to him!” he recounted to the various scents of his classmates, remembering the unique ones that stood out (Except for the angel. Never again.) “I should find Yumeno-chan! She could fix it!” he got up, pacing around slightly as he put his plan together in his head. “Mhh, I should also make a few stops as well. Maybe buy him a gift myself? Yeah.. yeah, that could work!” he began to hop in place, excitement running through his veins. Ouma suddenly froze, whipping around to look at his cat on the couch and kneel in front of her, holding his finger out.

“Panta-chan, you’re a smart kitty! I need you to stay with Saihara-chan the entire time in case anything happens. And if that anything tries to happen, distract him, ok?” the cat meowed, pawing his finger in response. The incubus grinned, planting a kiss on the cat’s head before setting out on his plan. He carefully slipped out of the house, sneaking around and under windows in case Saihara was there. When he peeked into the detective’s room, he counted his blessings; he wasn’t inside! He pried the window open just enough to retrieve that hat before shutting it, bolting into the neighborhood with the hat tucked safely under his arm.

* * *

 

“Nyeh… What do you want, Ouma-kun?” the sleepy witch rubbed her eyes as she stared at the incubus at her window. “Why couldn’t you use the door?”

“Because stealth. Anyways, you’re a mage, aren’t you?” he grinned, noting the girl perk ever so slightly.

“Finally, someone gets it… That doesn’t answer my first question, though…”

“Ok,” he took the torn hat and held it up for the mage to see. “Think you can fix it? You gotta have a tome in there or something!”

Yumeno blinked, taking the hat and carefully inspecting it.

“Ohh, this is old...” she muttered. “Uhm, this is gonna take a lot of MP to fix… I dunno…”

Ouma clasped his hands together, staring deep into her eyes with his own, large and bright.

“Please, Yumeno-chan? It’d mean a lot to me…” he cooed.

“Sorry, Ouma-kun, but that stare doesn’t work on me…” she yawned, the incubus whining in disappointment. “But, I sense you really meant it, so I’ll do it. I’m gonna need some supplies, though. I need something magical and sweet, and ¥6796.” The incubus nearly choked.

“Why do you need so much? What could you possibly have that costs that much??”

“Nyeh… I can make lots of stuff disappear with my magic… The internet bill isn’t one of them.” She shrugged. Ouma paused, before sighing.

“Alright, fine.” He huffed, giving her the worn hat. “I know where to get magical sweets, so I’ll be back. Can you try to work on it in the meantime?” The mage nodded, takin the hat carefully as she closed her window. The leader couldn’t help but fist pump in success as soon as he was alone, running off into the city to get the rest of the stuff on his mental checklist.

* * *

 

“Chika-chan!” Ouma bursted through the door to his workplace, the manager in question squealing in surprise as she dropped her tray of food. “Aheheh, oops…”

“Ah, yes. Hello, Ouma-kun.” The brunette smiled slightly. “What brings you here? You have the day off.”

“Yeah, I know, but I’m here as a customer! Can I get a shortcake, pretty please?” he smiled lightly. The woman blinked before giggling quietly.

“I suppose! Is it for your friend of yours?” she teased lightly. Ouma crossed his arms, pouting slightly.

“No, it’s for a different friend, actually! And that’s not a lie.” He insisted, following his manager to the counter. She brought out a small strawberry shortcake and performed a small magic chant, pretending to sprinkle it onto the cake. The incubus grinned brightly, giving Chika the change and taking the cake excitedly.

“Thanks a bunch, Chika-chan!” he sang as he bounced to the door, stopping to look at her over his shoulder. “Speaking of, if Saihara-chan comes around, I wasn’t here, ok?”

“Heheh, ok!” the woman giggled, waving goodbye to her coworker. “Happy Holidays, Ouma-kun!”

* * *

 

“Ok, here.” Ouma shoved the cake into the mage’s hands. “Will this do?” Yumeno inspected the cake before nodding.

“Yes, this should do nicely… As for the hat, I think I can save it. I’ve managed to fix some of the holes and it looks like it wasn’t even there.”

“Oh my god, I love you.” He cheered before it devolved into a snicker. “Ah, but that’s a lie! I really do appreciate it, though. I have other plans, but I’ll be back in an hour!” Yumeno gave a small smile, giving him the ok sign before watching the boy take off once more.

Ouma eventually stopped at a nearby house, knocking on the door as he looked around for any traces of Saihara.

“Alright, alright, I’m coming! Chill your fucking tits.” Iruma swung the door open before pausing, staring at the boy before her. “Oh.”

“Merry Christmas, Iruma-chan!” he sang, hands behind his back. “I have a _big_ favor to ask of you!”

“What do you want, shrimp dick?”

“Don’t play dumb with that,” he huffed. “It’s a _huge_ favor. You’re good at making stuff. Can you whip up a few Christmas decorations? _Without_ having them induce orgasms?” The inventor choked, sputtering in a vain attempt to cover herself.

“Well, _maybe_! What’s in it for me?” she crossed her arms. Ouma paused, steeling himself for what he was about to do. The incubus attached himself to the taller girl, pressing his face against her chest and staring at her with large purple eyes.

“Heeeeeeeee--!!” she squealed, face a bright red.

“Please, Iruma-chaaan? It’d mean a lot!” he purred.

“A-alright, alright!” she whined, prying the incubus off. “J-just, don’t press on my tits, you’ll ruin them!” Iruma cleared her throat before continuing. “I’ll try to get them done in an hour, so go play with yourself or something.”

“Thanks a bunch, Iruma-chan!” he winked spinning on a heel to run back to the city. The inventor huffed, shutting the door behind her before covering her face in her hands, squealing to herself.

* * *

 

The incubus gasped loudly as he stared at the mannequins in front of the clothes store. There were two types of sweaters available. He wasted no time hopping into the mall, wincing at the mess of people and clothes the large store contained.

“Let’s find that sweater!” he sang to himself as he weaved through the crowds. As much as he hated his height, he had to admit this was very much helpful. He hummed a quick little tune, approaching the sweaters when he heard the faint call of his name, blood running cold as a familiar scent caught his attention.

_Shit, it was Saihara._

Ouma immediately booked it, weaving through the crowd in a dizzying pattern in an attempt to shake him off. After a few moments of his constant direction turning, he heard the other boy’s voice fade off into the crowd and his scent disappear. The incubus heaved a sigh of relief, recounting his steps to where the sweaters were located. He gave a loud whine as he discovered one of the sweaters was gone before it transitioned into an annoyed groan as he snatched up the other sweater that he saw on display. At least it was in his size… He quickly made his way to the registers, paying for the sweater and gift box before zooming out of the store. He only had two more stops to make…

* * *

 

“Here, ya fucking twink.” Iruma shoved the box of ornaments into Ouma’s hands, the boy’s eyes sparkling excitedly.

“Thanks again, Iruma-chan! You’re not so bad after all! For a slutty skank anyways.” He teased, leaning his body against her as a sort of makeshift hug. It was the least he could do. The inventor squeaked, not getting a chance to respond before the male was off. She huffed once more, though she couldn’t help the small grin that appeared on her face.

Ouma ran as fast his legs could carry him before he skidded to a stop in front of Yumeno’s window, seeing the mage dozing off on the windowsill. She managed to wake up in time, yawning as she passed him the hat back.

“Mmn, here ya go. And thanks for the cake. That’s really good MP fuel.” She smiled lightly.

“Thanks, Yumeno-chan! You’re a lifesaver!” he grinned as he let the hat sit on top of the boxes. He gave his quick ‘Happy Holidays’ before he ran to the house, sneaking in through the window once more.

He scanned the house, nose twitching slightly and gave a huff of relief. He made it home before Saihara did. If he didn’t waste any time, he could get to working on the finishing touches of his plan!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 3RD BASE 3RD BASE 3RD BASE AAAAAAAAAA


	13. The Thirstiest Time of the Year pt. 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> finale of the christmas special! <3

Saihara fumbled with the keys to the flat, sighing quietly. He was sad that his attempts at catching and reconciling with the incubus ended in failure, but he supposed if he was ready to come back and talk, he would. He unlocked the door, taking in the dark emptiness of the inside. It felt like a part of his life went missing. He set the bag on the floor, letting the small kitten climb out and shake herself clean.

“I suppose it’s time for dinner, isn’t it?” he smiled gently at the cat, getting a purr in response. Once he made his way into the kitchen, he grabbed a can of food and emptied it into the bowl, watching Panta eat it with enthusiasm. Saihara gave her a quick scratch behind the ears and sitting at the kitchen table—What is that smell? The detective blinked, turning to see a mug, filled with a drink. Smelled like cocoa… He carefully touched it, wincing slightly as he felt the scorching heat radiating from the mug. It was freshly made…

Saihara bolted to his feet, exiting the kitchen to look around the flat before noticing the living room being filled with a faint, colorful glow. He found himself stopping at the doorframe, gasping slightly at the scene in front of him. The tree was upright and beautifully decorated with new ornaments and lights. He could’ve sworn he saw little ornaments of him, his flatmate, and even Panta! ...No wait, she was the tree topper. Of course. His eyes wandered down to the base of the tree, two different sized presents wrapped carefully with a bow on top. As he stepped closer to the tree, he felt something press against his back, circling around his body.

“Merry Christmas!” Saihara looked behind him, nearly bursting into tears as he saw a familiar pair of mysterious purple eyes shine back at his own gold pair.

“Ouma-kun..!” he choked out, not caring that his tears had begun to fall. “I’m so, so sorry I yelled at you, I should’ve told you about the hat, I—“

“Saihara-chan, it’s Christmas, stop crying you baby!” he joked, lifting one arm to playfully pinch the detective’s cheek. “More importantly, where did you go? You left me all by my lonesome!” Saihara’s face flushed as he cleared his throat, carefully removing the clingy incubus as he left the room, coming back with the boxes.

“I, uh, got these for you.” He smiled awkwardly. “I felt awful not being able to properly apologize, so I hope these would do.” Ouma gasped in an overly exaggerated manner, hands to his cheeks as his wings flapped.

“What’s this? Is my beloved Saihara-chan trying to win me over with gifts?!” he folded his arms and shook his head with a grin. “Well, as much as I’d love to see what you got me, I’d rather you open your gifts first! Preferably the biggest one.” The incubus didn’t even give Saihara a chance to move before he shoved the box into his arms. The detective coughed at the surprising force before unwrapping the gift, perking up at the content inside. It was a cute striped sweater, with a small pawprint patch above the heart.

“Oh wow..!” Saihara grinned brightly. “It’s adorable, Ouma-kun! This was at the store, right?”

“Maaaaybe! I mean, it’s no _virgin killer_ , but I thought you’d like it.” he sang before latching onto his arm. “What about my gift, what did you get me?”

“Ah, uh.. About that.” The detective blushed hard, scooting a box towards his flatmate. The smaller male wasted no time tearing into the gift, gasping loudly at what was inside.

“You got it. You _actually_ got it!” Ouma held up the sweater, laughing excitedly. “I know what I’m gonna wear tomorrow when I wake you up!”

“Anyways--!” Saihara said a bit too loudly for his liking. “I got another thing.” He passed the small box to the incubus and he took it, opening the lid and freezing, the smell of sweet chocolate filling the air. What got him by surprise was the message scribbled onto the cake.

**_'Thanks for being an amazing flatmate and friend. Merry Christmas.'_ **

Ouma set the cake down carefully before looking up at the detective, tears gathering in his eyes, bawling about the message. Saihara knew immediately those tears were fake, but there was a glint of genuine appreciation in his eyes, and that was good enough for him. Ouma’s tears stopped as soon as they started before he crawled to the tree, grabbing the last present and handed it to the detective.

“Here, you definitely deserved this!” he grinned brightly as Saihara carefully took the box. As he unwrapped and opened it, he couldn’t stop the gasp that escaped him. Resting inside was his hat, all in one piece as if it was never torn. He carefully took the hat out of the box, running his fingers along the surface.

“Ouma-kun, I… I don’t know what to say…” he smiled a tearful smile at the incubus. “Thank you so much…” Ouma simply grinned in response as he tackled the detective, squeezing tight.

“See? I busted my tail to make it up to you!” he laughed. “Doesn’t it show how much of a caring flatmate I am?” Saihara simply patted the smaller male’s head, chuckling slightly.

“Yeah, yeah.” He felt something brush against his free hand and turned to see Panta, plant in her mouth and a sparkle in her eyes. Saihara blushed heavily before taking the plant and clearing his throat. “I, uh, have one more present for you, if that’s ok…” he began. This immediately grabbed the incubus’s attention, staring up at him with excitement.

“Ohh? I wonder what my beloved detective got me now—“ he froze mid-sentence, feeling Saihara brush the hair out of his forehead and planting a small kiss on the exposed skin. The detective couldn’t help but laugh inwardly as he heard the sound of the small male’s wings popping open before pulling away. He lowered his hand to show he had dangled a mistletoe above them both, blushing heavily.

“Sorry, I...” he rubbed the back of his neck awkwardly before he felt his body get pushed back slightly. Saihara looked down to see the incubus had clung to him once more, face buried in his shirt. “Was it that embarrassing? It was Panta-chan’s idea…” The detective tried not to burst out laughing at the muffled, strange noise that resembled a shriek and a whine.

“Panta-chaaaaaan!” Ouma turned to the cat, who tilted her head. “How could you trick Saihara-chan like that! Now I’ll never get married!” he began to cry, Saihara awkwardly patting his head and being just as embarrassed. That night, they both silently agreed to themselves.

Saihara told himself that Ouma was simply a friend and nothing more, and that reconciling with him _did not_ send him over the moon.

Ouma told himself that he was still low on energy, and that stunt _did not_ do anything to get some of his power back.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> AND THATS IT  
> ill go back to my weird schedule of uploading when i feel like it now  
> i hope everyone had a merry christmas and enjoyed this little 4-parter!♥


	14. A Dick a Day Keeps the Doctor Away! (No that's... that's not how the saying goes...)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> HEY SO IVE BEEN  
> MEANING TO MENTION THIS BUT I WANNA SAY THANK YALL SO MUCH FOR THE SUPPORT??? ive been reading every comment i get and crying legit tears so sdnkfnf  
> this might be the last chapter before we hit 2018 well see  
> i hope you all had a great holiday and heres to the new year if i dont update beforehand! <3  
> this is the longest chapter ive written at 6 pages in word yall deserve it in the form of a sickfic! cause who doesnt love sickfics heheh

"Ouma-kun?" Saihara knocked on his flatmate's door. "Ouma-kun, get up we’re supposed to go grocery shopping. He put his ear to the door, listening for noise before he received a faint moan in response.

"Saihara-chan..." the detective's face lit up a lovely shade of red. “Saihara-chan… I _need_ you... Please, come inside..."

"I, uh.." there’s no way he’s doing... _that_ , is he? Regardless, he found himself turning the handle of the door and letting himself into the room. He found the incubus in his bed, body quivering, face flushed and eyes half lidded.

“Saihara-chan…” he whimpered in heavy pants.

"Am I interrupting something?" Saihara blushed. "Cause if I am, I can just leave--"

"No!! No." Ouma begged as he leaned closer. Or as close as he could while still in bed. “I just… I just need… ah... ahhh..." the incubus's nose twitched before he let out a sneeze, the detective jumping in shock when he saw small puffs of light purple smoke and fire appear. The smaller male’s body wobbled slightly before he collapsed onto his side, breathing heavily.

“Ouma-kun?!” Saihara gasped as he rushed to his flatmate’s side, feeling his forehead. He let out a sharp pained hiss, retracting his hand at how hot the skin was. That wasn’t a normal fever… He carefully wrapped the incubus up in his blankets, whistling into the quiet flat. Seconds later, Panta appeared, mewling quietly.

“We need to figure out what’s wrong with Ouma-kun, come with me for support?” he offered sheepishly. The cat simply padded closer, pressing her side against the detective’s leg. Saihara smiled gently, leaving the flat to go see someone who had an idea on what was wrong.

* * *

 

“Oof, this is a bad one.” Yumeno crossed her arms as she looked at the incubus wrapped in the blanket. He was propped up against the wall in her talent room, unable to be anywhere else due to his horns being clearly visible.

“Himiko, you know about supernatural stuff because magic, right?” Saihara frowned. “I know you’re a magician, but if Ouma-kun’s an actual incubus, does that mean your magic is real as well?”

“Mage, not magician!” the smaller duo piped in, Ouma quieter than Yumeno. Saihara couldn’t help but quirk a brow at that. Since when were they that close? It kinda bothered him a little… Wait no—

“Jeez, Saihara-chan… You’re bad at this talking to girls thing... Nishishi…” he laughed weakly before it devolved into a cough, purple smoke puffs coming out. The mage frowned as she walked over to the sick boy, leaning close to inspect him.

“Umm, he’s sick.” Yumeno deducted.

“Yes, I can see that, Yumeno-san—“

“BUT! It’s not an ordinary sickness. It’s a umm… Hang on.” She walked over to the curtains towards the back and pulled them apart to fish around for a book. Once successful, she flipped through the pages before stopping on one. “Aha! Ouma-kun’s come down with a very strong flu only demons can catch. So you and his familiar are safe.”

“Familiar?” Saihara echoed. Ouma laughed, feeling Panta nuzzle him through the blankets.

“She means, Panta-chan!”

“Yeah.” The mage nodded as she continued to read. “Thankfully there’s a cure, but I need ingredients.” She turned the book for the detective to read, eyebrows furrowed in confusion at each passing line.

_Take a dash of savor for flavor_

_And wood fresh from a fire_

_A sickeningly sweet temptation_

_And a true heart’s desire._

“Why is this a riddle?” Saihara frowned.

“Cause it’s a spell. They gotta rhyme.”

“Oh. Right.” The detective sighed as he looked over to his flatmate, who had begun to shiver once more. It broke his heart, seeing the incubus deteriorate like that… “I suppose I should get a move on, finding the ingredients, huh?”

“Nyeh, I’ll start prepping for when you come back, I suppose..” the mage stretched her arms with a yawn.

“Alright, call me if there’s any changes to Ouma-kun’s health.” He nodded as he left. Panta looked between the two males before nuzzling Ouma once more, darting after Saihara.

* * *

 

“Um, excuse me?” Saihara had made his way to a convenience store to pick up the first ingredient and was currently grabbing the attention of an employee with fluffy brown hair. The male in question perked up, turning to look at the detective with curious olive eyes. “Hi, um, I was wondering if you had savor? I think it’s a spice, perhaps?” The brunette tapped his chin carefully before nodding with a smile, gesturing Saihara to follow him.

The employee scanned the spices isle before grabbing a small bottle, handing it to the detective.

“Ah, thank you so much!” he smiled brightly with a nod, taking it and making his way to the registers. After successfully getting the spices, he tapped his chin thoughtfully as he walked out the store. Wood fresh from a fire… “Aha!” he snapped his fingers as he ran back to his flat. As he entered, he looked around, trying to find a particular room, stopping when he was in front of Ouma’s. He frowned, subconsciously tracing the doorknob with his fingers as he thought back to the sick incubus. He really hoped that he was doing this right and he would get better. It pained him to see his flatmate so sick and weak, even losing weight behind his usual quips. He wanted to see him back on his feet, cheerful and happy, maybe making those embarrassing advances on him once more, and…

Saihara shook his head to clear his thoughts. He was getting sidetracked, he could worry about that when Ouma’s better. He pressed on, stopping once he was in front of his study room and knocked. Only to realize that, it was his study room, he didn’t need to knock. At this point he was probably pretty happy Ouma wasn’t around to see that. Nonetheless, he made his way inside, collecting the ashes what was left behind in the currently burnt out fireplace into a small test tube and sealed it before pocketing it and going back to his list. A sickeningly sweet temptation? That had to be sweets. He slipped into the kitchen to grab a slice of the cake he got Ouma for Christmas and wrapped it when his phone began to ring. Once he checked the caller id, he answered immediately.

“How’s Ouma-kun?” he asked a little too excitedly for his liking.

“Uhh… I dunno. I think he fell asleep? But he’s not showing any signs of getting better…”

Saihara’s heart dropped at the news.

“Oh, I… I see… W-well, I got all but one ingredient, so I won’t be long, and Ouma-kun will be safe!” he responded before letting a small, “…Right?” slip out.

“I think so? You should hurry though, so it doesn’t get worse.”

“Ok, I will. See you in a bit.” Saihara clicked the end button with a trembling hand. He pulled out his list and read over the final ingredient.

_A true heart’s desire._

He hated how vague that was. That could be anything. It opened up too many possibilities and at the rate things are going, he wasn’t gonna be able to find it before Ouma’s condition gets too bad and he ends up beyond saving.

Saihara felt his eyes get misty once more. He didn’t want to say goodbye to Ouma. But he didn’t know what the hell the book meant by ‘heart’s desire’. Was it was the incubus wanted? Should he search around for his favorite things? Ah, no, he’d get angry if they became potion fodder. He tugged down on his hat and shivered, scared of the idea of losing his flatmate, his friend, his…

A mewl was heard, causing the detective to turn his head. Panta was sitting close to him, purring gently and nuzzling his leg. He paused, looking at the cat before kneeling down to pick her up. Could the answer be cat fur? Hell if he knew, but he wasn’t gonna lay a hand on the kitten even if it Ouma didn’t get a say in it. She nuzzled his chin and he sighed, grabbing the cake slice with his free hand.

“I guess we should go back, huh?” _‘I did the best I could…’_

* * *

 

Yumeno had sat herself at the incubus’s side, watching him hang on to consciousness. Part of her wanted to tell him to rest, but the other part was saying if he did he might not wake up. She hasn’t seen anything like this, let alone this badly. She continued flipping through her book and read before finally breaking the silence.

“Ouma-kun? Did you eat?”

“Mh?” Ouma looked at her with glossy eyes.

“Of course I’ve been eating. I had cake last night.”

“No, I mean, have you been… y’know? That thing you do.”

“Oh, yes. I’ve been getting busy with Saihara-chan since we met!” Yumeno gave him an unimpressed look before going back to her book.

“Says here that if you _were_ getting busy, you wouldn’t even be in this condition.” Ouma swore in his head at the information, of course that book would say that. “Why didn’t you tell Saihara-kun about this?” The incubus shrugged.

“I dunno, cause I like the thrill?” he gave a weak smile. “Ah, but that’s a lie. I’ve had my sights on him, yeah, but I bet that book doesn’t tell you that it’s better for there to be mutual attraction, huh?”

“….” She skimmed through the book, staring at the pages before Ouma continued.

“That was a lie too! Or maybe it’s not. But I do want Saihara to be mine, though at the same time, I want _him_ to want it too. It’d just be boring if it’s just me, y’know?” Himiko paused before laughing, causing the leader to pout. “What’s with that laugh, you sound like a witch!”

“Oh man, you have it bad.” She giggled as she shut her book to get up. “You should tell him.”

“Tell him what? Tell me or I’ll… I’ll burn your cards!” he started coughing violently after his getting worked up, clearing his throat clear of smoke to continue speaking in a raspy voice. “Or not…” he groaned, falling over. Yumeno quickly sat him up and saw his eyes were shut, quickly dialing Saihara to update him on what was wrong. She spent the rest of the time pacing back and forth, book in hand before perking up at a knock on the door.

Once opened, Saihara nearly barged in, panting heavily. He must’ve ran all the way here.

“I got the rest of the ingredients, but I don’t know what to do for the last one.” The detective frowned.

“Oh, well I guess we can figure that out later?” she said as she took the ingredients and made her way to the caldron in the back of the room, Saihara close behind. The detective fidgeted in place as he watched her set up, muttering something about stored mana, before he finally spoke up.

“I—Teach me how to make it, please.” The mage looked up at him in surprise.

“Are you sure? I mean, it’s really complex, and only a really powerful mage can—“

“I don’t care!” Saihara’s face colored at his sudden outburst before continuing in a gentler tone. “Please, Yumeno-san. I want to help him.”

The mage blinked before nodding, gesturing him over to teach him.

As they worked on the potion, the detective stole glances at his flatmate, who was still out like a light. His chest tightened at the sight and it’d make him focus on the potion, doubling his efforts. If made right, it should turn colors. However, since they were lacking the final ingredient, it just looked like a muddy mess. Saihara placed his hands on the edge of the caldron, staring at it as if whatever was in it would stare right back.

“Yumeno-san, what color is it supposed to be exactly?”

“Nyeh… I think pink? But we’re missing that heart’s desire thingy, so it’s not done…”

Of course it wasn’t. As if it was made of lead, Saihara looked at the incubus, who was once again laid out on the floor. He couldn’t even sit up at this point.

“I’m sorry, Ouma-kun...” the detective whispered to himself in a broken voice. Panta padded to her friend, curling up against him and licked his blanket, as any attempted to lick his face caused her to nearly burn her tongue. Saihara let his head hang once more as he felt Yumeno pat his back. He couldn’t help it.

He let his tears fall into the mixture below.

“I’m sorry, Ouma-kun. I’m so sorry…” it was all he knew what to say. More than anything, he wanted to help the incubus recover. His thoughts from earlier resurfaced, and they became more enticing that they were earlier. They were embarrassing, yes, but, they were so _welcomed_. He didn’t care anymore. The incubus could tease, joke, flirt, _anything,_ as much as he wanted, if it made him happy and healthy. He wanted to spend more time with him. He wanted Ouma to get better.

“Nyeh, Saihara-kun!” Yumeno shook his shoulder with a gasp. “Look, the potion!” Saihara opened his eyes slowly before gasping at the sight in front of him. The color went from a muddy brown to a vivid pink color. He could feel the warmth radiating from the liquid as he wiped his eyes free, letting the remaining tears fall into the large pot.

“It… Changed color…?” If the last ingredient was a true heart’s desire, then…

Saihara’s face flushed, feeling his own heart skip a beat. Ohhhh, fuck…

“You must’ve really wanted him to get better!” the mage piped.

Saihara nodded slowly before getting over his initial shock. He quickly grabbed a small bowl, scooping as much as he could and made his way to the incubus, sitting him up properly once more. He saw the smaller male’s lips were already parted and pushed his thoughts away, bringing the edge of the bowl to them and tipped it and his head back, letting the incubus drink the contents as he ignored the burning feeling in his hand until the bowl was empty.

After a moment of silence, Ouma’s eyes cracked open.

“Blrgh… That tastes like shit.” He whined pitfully. A familiar kind of pitifully.

“Ouma-kun—!” Saihara and Yumeno cheered, gathering the pouting leader into a hug with Panta snuggling into his lap.

“Ah, hey! Stop hugging me before you break my wings!” he complained, the two letting go with an apology, Yumeno’s being less sincere than Saihara’s.

“I’m just… I’m so happy you’re better.” The detective smiled, tears gathering in his eyes. Ouma blinked before looking down at his cat, petting her head gently.

“Man, you’re crying again? You’re gonna run out of tears at this point!” he teased, looking up at the detective from beneath his eyelashes. Saihara couldn’t help but laugh, face coloring once more as he felt a warmth bloom in his chest. Even if it was for a day, he missed this so much…

“Gaaaaaaay.” And of course, Yumeno had to ruin the moment. Ouma burst out laughing as he jumped to his feet, Panta attaching to the blanket covering his back.

“I know, right? He’s been crying over me since Christmas! You’d think he’d be like this about Akamatsu-chan!” he chimed as he stretched. “Anyways, thanks for the help! I’m gonna go home and sleep in. An incubus needs his beauty sleep, after all!” With that, he ran out of the room. After a pause, Yumeno spoke up.

“He doesn’t have the key, does he?”

“Nope.” Saihara sighed with a bemused smile. “I’ll go let him in before he breaks a window lock.” The detective gave the small mage his thanks and goodbyes before he chased after the incubus. He knew the incubus was messing around with what he said, but it had him thinking. He was close with the pianst, yes, but he didn’t think much about it? He hasn’t felt anything until he met Ouma and _waaaaaait._

Saihara froze mid walk as his eyes slowly widened, thinking about how his thoughts about his flatmate began sounding a lot less platonic, how he had been driven to tears when the worst happened, how his heart sored when they recovered from them. The incubus’s cheeriness, the eccentricities, the way Saihara’s life was more exciting with him simply existing…

And the realization hit him like a truck. The detective felt his face heat up for what was possibly the 10th time that day, his heart doing backflips between his chest and his stomach.

“Oh…. Oh god.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> saihara has now hit stage 5 of the 5 stages of Gay  
> also did you see that store cameo :3c


	15. Don't Stick Your Dick in Crazy

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> o of sorry i havent upated in a long while i got horribly stuck on this mdksfmsld im bad at serious plotlines  
> hopefully after this mini thing ill be able to get the creative juices flowing again and update more often with better stuff! ;o;

Saihara yawned as he absentmindedly pet the bundle of fur currently in his lap. He was killing time watching tv before calling it a night, with Panta purring contently, occasionally nuzzling his hand if she wanted a few scratched behind the ears for a change of pace. It was a rather quiet evening, and he was close to dozing off on the couch, his petting of the kitten gradually slowing. One moment, he was resting his eyes, and the next, they fluttered for a bit, shooting open when he was greeted to a new sight in front of him.

 Ouma was in front of the tv with his back facing the detective and _was he wearing that sweater he got for Christmas, oh god—_

Saihara’s face turned a brilliant shade of red as the incubus looked over his shoulder with a playful grin before turning to face him completely.

“Sooo~? Doesn’t it look good on me?” he sang. The detective wanted to blurt out ‘Yes’ but he kept that in his head. Instead, he was frozen on the spot as he faintly registered Panta leaving his lap and the couch, padding off somewhere. Ouma took that as an opportunity to take her place, throwing his weight and wrapping his arms around Saihara, causing him to fall backwards in response.

“O-Ouma-kun, I…” Saihara could feel his heart beating loudly in his ears, and prayed to whatever higher power the incubus couldn’t hear. But the seductive smirk on the other’s face seemed to have said otherwise.

“Hey, Saihara-chan. Be honest, do you like what you see?” Ouma purred lowly as he leaned closer, the detective’s body shivering slightly in response.

“Well, I… I, uh…” Saihara swallowed nervously. He felt like he was suffocating, his newfound knowledge about his feelings giving the entire moment an entirely new feeling. It was like he was being drawn in, and he wasn’t sure if he could handle it. Heat began to creep up his neck as he was staring into the smaller male’s eyes as his face grew ever so close, almost taunting, almost as if asking permission.

The moment was broken as the tv began to play something else. Something that sounded very important. Saihara directed his attention to the tv as he felt the incubus shift, settling for laying his head on his chest in what seemed like bored defeat.

_‘Last night, a 21 year old woman was found dead in Tokyo, following the string of murders that have sprung up in recent months.’_

Saihara propped himself on his elbows as if it’d help him concentrate, the incubus clinging to him in response as he turned his head as well. As the report went on, there were mentions of the victims having a long slash mark across their faces as if etched in a permanent smile, many of which being female. It seemed to be pinned on a youkai; a Kuchisake-onna, to be specific. This earned a noise from Ouma.

“Whaaat? There’s no way that’s a real thing!”

“Congratulations. You just said that.” Saihara stared at the smaller male, unimpressed. Ouma couldn’t help but giggle, wings flapping slightly.

“I know, I was kidding!” he sang. “So anyways, how long?”

“How long… what?”

“It’s a string of murders, Saihara-chan! They’re probably gonna pick you to figure it out, detective~”

Saihara sputtered before recovering properly.

“I’m only an apprentice detective, though. If anything, they’d probably go to Kirigiri-san for something like this.”

Ouma stared at him with a blank face as he propped himself on his elbows.

“Saihara-chan, what’s your talent?”

“…Ultimate Detective?”

“And _how_ did you get that talent?”

“Solving a murder case…?” The incubus held his hand out as if to say, ‘See where I’m going with this?’ “But that was jus—“ the detective was silenced with a finger to his lips.

“No buts. Only butts.” Ouma said sternly before removing his finger. “I guarantee you that you’re gonna be in charge of this case.” Saihara paused before speaking up.

“You’re not gonna seduce the police chief, are you?”

“Just because I did that to get a job doesn’t mean I’m always gonna do it.”

“Wait, you what—“

“Just trust me on this!” Ouma removed himself from the other male and slid into the kitchen, leaving behind a confused Saihara.

* * *

 

The next day had the detective sitting in the library on campus, tapping the end of his pencil to his lips as he stared at the case documents in front of him. True to the incubus's word, he was assigned the case, however it was surprisingly due to the fact that the other Ultimate was busy with other cases and suggested to let the male take a crack at it. He was as much of a 'great detective' as she was; let him have a shot, was her reasoning.

“Y’know, if you want me to kiss you, just say so!” Saihara was torn from his thoughts, staring at Ouma with a heavy blush on his face.

“W-what, no!” he sputtered. “Don’t ruin my concentration!” The leader simply stuck his tongue out as he looked at the books in front of them.

“So, what do you think is going on, Detective-chan?” Saihara huffed slightly at the nickname before clearing his throat.

“Well, if anything, it’d definitely inspired by the Kuchisake-onna. They all have the same sliced mouths…”

As the incubus was listening to his friend drone on, he tensed up, a cold shudder rolling down his back. He whipped his head around to find the source, purple slitted eyes meeting quiet, dark gold eyes, the only thing visible behind the medical mask covering the rest of the face. Saihara paused, looking up as he noticed the mysterious person as well.

“Ah… hello, Shinguji-kun.” He offered a friendly smile.

“Hello there, Saihara-kun. And… Ouma-kun, was it?” The incubus only nodded slowly, continuing to look with an owlish stare as if trying to decipher the masked male.

“I hear you’re looking into the Kuchisake-onna case.” Shinguji continued as he sat at the seat next to Ouma. The incubus scooted away in respone. “Do you know about the tale of such a creature?” Saihara tapped his pen to his chin thoughtfully before speaking.

“I think so. She’s a woman who had her face cut into a permanent smile.”

“Yes, because she was unfaithful. It’s wonderful, how humans can react to such a thing with that kind of intensity and make others suffer as well.” The masked male chuckled. “Do you suppose something similar happened to the victims in this case?”

Saihara paused before looking down at the photos the case came with and furrowed his brows. Most of the victims appeared to be female, but there was a just enough male victims to let it be an oversight.

“The Kuchisake-onna would prowl the streets at night, searching for her next victim. There have been few that escaped in the decades she’s been encountered, and their encounters spun the tale we’re all familiar with.” Shinguji continued. “Perhaps there’s a copycat killer at play here, continuing her legacy from long ago?”

Ouma fought back a low shiver as he looked at his friend, who was continuing to concentrate on his papers before snapping his fingers, standing to his feet.

“I think I have an idea on what to do!” Saihara grinned as he gathered his belongings. “Pardon me, Shinguji-kun, but this is very important.”

“Of course, Saihara-kun.” The masked male nodding, his smile showing in his eyes. He watched the detective leave, the smaller male following close behind. When the two left the building, Ouma let out an exaggerated sigh.

“Wow, that guy was creepy!” he huffed, putting his hands behind his head as he looked at the other. “Anyways, what’s your plan here?”

“Well, if I’m able to do the research and get everything right…” Saihara stopped in his tracks before looking down at his flatmate.

“I’m going to lure out the killer and capture them.”


	16. Don't Stick Your Dick in Crazy pt 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> oof i died again im sorry  
> i had to deal w tooth extractions and depressions so rip me  
> i think teres gonna be one more chapter for this arc? idk im struggling  
> also bless pate for making this hhhh http://leggyre.tumblr.com/post/170851902661/list-of-things-ive-wanted-to-do-for-a-while-draw

_In the depths of the night, a young woman sang to herself as she traced the ruined face of her latest victim. She ran her fingers down his chest until they rested over his heart. With a small pause, she grinned, fangs bare as she decided to go one step further with her meal._

_It’s not like anyone would notice, right?_

* * *

 

“Saihara-chan, have I told you how much of an actual idiot you are yet?”

“Yes, you told me that exact same sentence every five minutes until we got home.” Saihara sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose. He didn’t expect the incubus to be _this_ wound up, considering he’s... "Aren't you a demon, Ouma-kun? I'd think you'd be ok with something like this."

"First off, I'm an _incubus_ ; I’m a lover, not a fighter." Saihara wasn’t even gonna challenge him on that. Instead, he decided to try to put his friend’s worries to rest.

“I’m gonna study this person's patterns so I can figure out where and how to lure them. So far we know they don’t seem to discriminate with victims, and that slit mouth smile.." the detective said thoughtfully. Ouma shrugged slightly. They'd have to figure it out as the days progress.

"Well, I suppose we'll figure it out soon, huh, Saihara-chan?"

"—Whoa, hold on. Who said _you_ could help?" Saihara frowned. Ouma whimpered, eyes watering up.

"Am I really not allowed to help my beloved Saihara-chan?”

"No, because you're not trained for this kind of thing." The detective crossed his arms. "Not to mention it's downright dangerous."

"Oh my, are you actually worried about me?" Ouma giggled. Saihara simply rose a brow, as if silently reminding him the past few times he _cried_ over him. Before he could voice his thoughts, the incubus hopped ahead, laughing. With a sigh, the detective gave chase.

* * *

 

Ouma's terrible at following directions. So when he was told not to help, he did so anyways. The first step being him ever so gracefully kicking down a door at the school, startling a girl inside.

"Hey, Shirogane-chaaan!" the leader sung as he skipped up to her. "Can I ask for a favor?" The cosplayer squinted, clearly distrusting his word before the incubus pouted. "It's not anything bad! I just wanna give your cosplay stuff a shot! It’s genuinely interesting!" Ouma held his hands behind his back, rocking on his heels slightly.

“What’s the catch?” Shirogane squirted harder, pointing a needle at him in an accusational manner. The leader whimpered, eyes welling up with tears.

“D-don’t get so violent with me!!” he whined. “I was hoping I could show off one of your designs at work, see if I could help inspire my fellow coworkers with something _adorable_!” Ouma danced closer until he was leaning over, giggling quietly as he tilted his head. “Think you could do that for me?”

Shirogane paused before huffing and reaching out, squishing the incubus’s cheeks as if she was kneading dough (much to his protest).

“I have this sinking feeling you won’t stop crying unless I say yes, so… I’ll see what I can do. What kind of ‘adorable’ are you aiming for?”

* * *

 

Saihara was at the flat, looking through the case files and scrunching his eyebrows in concentration. No matter how he looked at the case, he couldn’t figure out how to go about even pinning a suspect down. He looked down to see Panta hopping into his lap, giving him purrs of encouragement. He smiled, gently rubbing under her chin before he perked up at the sound of the door opening. Panta mewled in excitement as she jumped down to greet her friend, purrs growing louder.

“Oh, welcome home, Ouma-ku—“ Saihara paused as he turned around, taking in the sight in front of him. He could faintly tell that was his flatmate, but with the combination of sharp makeup and a charming, sultry dress, he looked like an entirely different person. At this rate, Saihara shouldn’t have been surprised since the incubus is always finding outfits to tease him with, but this however felt… Different.

“Do you like it? I got Shirogane-chan to doll me up!” he twirled in his dress before halting to a stop, giggling. “Oh, probably shouldn’t do that, lest you see something you wouldn’t wanna see! Unless you _want_ to see~.” Saihara’s face lit up as he turned away, willing away the developing image of what was under that skirt. From the corner of his eye, he could see the incubus approach with the skirt being pulled up ever so slightly before letting the edges go.

"C'mon, Saihara-chaaaan~. Let's have ourselves some _fun_." Ouma continued his approach with a sway in his hips, the loose skirt following his movements until he slid into Saihara's lap, arms draped over his shoulders. Saihara in turn found himself stuttering as he felt the smaller male press closer. With a well aimed roll of the incubus's hips, the detective felt himself come slightly undone--

"See if you have it in you to please this dainty demon." The incubus giggled as he moved Saihara's hand to rest on the visible skin on his thigh. The detective was overwhelmed by the pleasant heat and the combination of Ouma's naturally sultry sweet smell and a hint of grape perfume and had resorted to burying his face in the leader's shoulder, trying vainly to hold onto what semblance of self control he had left. His body seemed to have betrayed him though, free arm holding Ouma in place as the other hand pulled him closer, encouraged by the incubus’s breathy purr.

It took Saihara’s phone blaring from his desk to startle him back to his senses, having to catch Ouma at the last moment before he fell over from the sudden movement. He shot the pouting leader an apologetic look and grabbed the phone, answering it quickly. With a sigh, Saihara hung up and and pocketed his phone.

“Alright, so apparently something changed with the evidence, so I have to go and get it real quick. I won’t take long, so don’t get into any trouble, ok?” the detective murmured. Without thinking, he had leaned down to give the incubus a small peck on the corner of his lips before he froze. Upon realizing what he did, he (carefully) shoved Ouma out of his lap and got up, clearing his throat.

“Um, yeah, I’ll just. I’ll just go now.” The detective stuttered before running out of the flat. The incubus just stared at the empty space Saihara was in, tail twitching. He was broken from his thoughts as he heard his cat companion meow, turning to see a hat in front of her paws.

“…Huh. He forgot his hat.” He picked it up before making his way outside, hiding his features and aiming to track his friend down. As he continued, the air outside began to thicken into puffs of mist, the incubus huffing as his vision was becoming mildly obscured. He put the hat on his head as he came to a stop, a voice speaking out among the mist.

 _“Hello?”_ Ouma squinted at the figure in front of him. He could make out stringy hair and a sort of tattered kimono, and a… medical mask? The figure approached, hand to their face ever so gingerly.

_“Do you think I’m pretty?”_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> oh shit


	17. Don't Stick Your Dick in Crazy pt 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> OK here comes the actual update  
> this one fought me for a while so pwease spare m e  
> ALSO THANK YOU ACEY FOR HELPING ME W THIS CHAPTER YOURE AMAZING  
> and thanks to those who threw me support in the april fools update <333

_"Jackie, are you **kidding** me?! I get we're 'bad monsters'," air quotes. "and all but that doesn’t mean you can just go around doing shit like that! Whatever happened to our 'no killing' rule?!"_

_"I **know** that, and I agree which is why I keep telling you **that’s not me!!** "_

_"Oh really?" A photo was shoved into the accused monster's face. "Then what's this?"_

_"That could be anyone. I mean it, you're accusing me when we have a literal **changeling** in our group!"_

_The changeling in question gasped quietly before her cheeks puffed out in anger._

_"Don't bring Lovebug into this!" another snapped._

_"Alright, alright." A slender male clapped his hands together to get everyone's attention. "Since leader isn’t here, I’m in charge. I’m sorry to say, Miss Jackson, but unless you can prove your innocence, you're no longer a part of our inner circle. You are dismissed."_

_The woman gasped, shock transforming into pained anger before she stormed off, face flushed and eyes dotted with tears._

* * *

 

Saihara stared blankly at the files in front of him as his supervisor droned on about the change. He was doing his best to pay attention, he really was, but his mind kept wandering back to the incubus and what could've happened if he didn’t get that phone call. Ouma had him practically wrapped around his finger, with that sultry charm and pretty eyes and gorgeous appearance, how perfectly he fit in the detective's lap as if he was meant to be there and how soft his skin felt—

"Saihara-kun!" Saihara was snapped from his thoughts as he stared dumbly at his supervisor. "Did you listen to anything I said?"

"I, uh..." the younger detective flicked his eyes between the upset man and the documents in front of them. There were photos of the male victims in the case, all of which also had gaping holes in their chests where their hearts would be. "Uhh..." Saihara began to sweat before another, much more feminine voice piped up.

“I think for the time being Saihara-kun should sit this one out. He’s clearly unfocused and it could cause some problems. I’ll look more into it and relay anything I find to him when he’s better." The man snorted slightly, turning back to the airheaded detective.

“Alright, fine. But don’t let this happen again."

Saihara nodded as he stood up and exited the building, the girl following behind.

"I, uh.. I’m sorry about that.” He smiled awkwardly at her. “But thank you for the cover?”

"Don't thank me. Focus on getting home and learning how to keep your emotions in check. It's kinda hard to get anything done when your partner's acting like a lovesick schoolgirl."

It was a playful jab in her own way, and it didn’t help that the raven-haired male was tripping over himself to explain, only to sigh in defeat.

"I.. I understand. Sorry.. I guess I just really don’t know how to go about any of this…" he muttered, a light flush on his cheeks. The lavender hair studied her partner’s expressions before speaking up.

“Might I suggest studying the object of your affections some to see what they would find most appealing? Perhaps then you can figure out how to make your feelings known, provided if it’s mutual on their end.”

Saihara let her words sink in as he thought back to the interactions with the incubus and then some. He certainly seemed to enjoy flirting when he's not casting his entire attention span towards the cat. Maybe...

"Yeah.. Yeah, that could work! Thanks, I'll give it a try." The raven haired male finally smiled at his partner before it was traded for a confused expression. "But I'm a bit confused? I never expected you to be a love expert…" The woman let the tiniest hint of a smile grace her features.

"What made you believe I was only married to my job?"

And just like that, it felt like the entire universe made sense to Saihara.

* * *

 

Ouma furrowed his brows as he stared at the strange figure in front of him. 'Am I pretty?' What the hell kind of question was that?

"I don’t know, _are_ you?" he asked back. The figure paused in surprise, allowing time for the incubus to continue. "Honestly, you can't expect anyone to give you a proper answer when you're standing in the dark with half of your face covered by some creepy medical mask. I can’t even tell a convincing lie with that lack of information!" With that, he turned and walked off to find a different route. "Now, if you'll _excuse_ me..."

Ouma found himself freezing in his tracks when a chilling laugh echoed into the empty space.

_"Ku... kukukukuku... My, my, you're the first to answer in such a manner."_

The incubus startled back as he turned, realizing just how close the voice had gotten. He stared with owl-like eyes as he registered a pair of golden eyes, far too tinted with darkness to be his beloved's.

"I thought something about you was familiar, it only took hearing your voice. We meet again, Ouma Kokichi."

"You're that weird occult guy from the library--!"

"Korekiyo Shinguji." He corrected. Ouma paused, willing the angry flush that appeared on his cheeks away as he put the pieces together in his head.

"That means you're that Kuchisake-onna killer." he scowled. "Where do you get off, doing this?"

"Ahh, you misunderstand me, dear Kokichi," the incubus's eyes slitted at the rather informal use of his name. “What you may see as cold blooded murder couldn't be any further from the truth. You see, I'm simply fufilling a request."

"You mean like some cold-blooded assassin."

"No. Assassins only kill for material things, such as money. I do this for love. I promised my dear sister I would send her lovely young ladies who could appreciate her and her beauty and befriend her."

Ouma simply stared, a blank look on his face.

"What about the male victims? They had those same fucked up scars on their faces as well."

"Ahh them. They had fallen into two categories; those who were unfaithful..." Shinguji stepped forward, the incubus stepping back each time.

"And those who knew too much."

That became his cue to run. With each passing step, he silently cursed himself for not changing into comfier attire before leaving. These shoes were a bitch to run in! This, naturally, failed to work in his favor as he found himself stumbling against a wall to regain his balance. He wasn’t quick enough, and the incubus found himself pinned by the serial killer.

Ouma's body let loose an unconscious shudder as the edge of a cool blade ghosted against his cheek. His heart was pounding as his mind went haywire, but he would be **_damned_** if he let it show.

Strangely enough, it felt like their position was held for an eternity before something happened. The masked male shifted, a flicker in his eyes Ouma barely caught before he spoke. That voice was the same, rusty yet feminine voice that he heard before any of this happened.

" _Korekiyo, dear, you shouldn't have waited so long._ " Was there someone here? An accomplice, perhaps? The question was answered when the incubus saw that same flicker. "Forgive me, Sister. I was too careless, and I'm willing to rectify that." Wait a second—

 _'Is this bitch talking to himself?!'_ Ouma shrieked in his head. He didn't let his discomfort show. He stayed poker-faced.

Korekiyo stared down at the incubus with another flicker, instead using the tip of the knife to trace the area of his cheek. Ouma felt his internal panic begin to rise, along with what felt like a familiar burning feeling...

" _Look at him, dear Korekiyo._ " He was going to die. Die by the hands by some incest-driven freakshow.

" _Look closely... He has such a beauty to him, it’s almost ethereal..._ " What if his family found out? The knife's tip ended at the corner of the incubus's lips.

" _Would you really want to ruin such a thing?_ " They would find out; his father would raise hell. What about his darling kitten? She'd be lonely without him. Him and—

"...You're right, dear Sister. It would be a shame to ruin a beauty such as this one. Perhaps there's a more effective method to use instead to take his life..." Saihara.

His flatmate, his friend.

His beloved Saihara.

_His Shuichi._

The fire-like feeling burning in his gut exploded, nerves alight at the sensation. Korekiyo moved back slightly in shock at the sight in front of him, glassy gold eyes meeting a new form taking the place of the petite male, slitted eyes a scorching hot pink.

**_"Don't touch me."_ **

* * *

 

"I'm back!" Saihara called as he entered the flat. There was silence except for the sound of Panta purring and rubbing against his legs. He smiled gently, sitting down and letting her sit in his lap.

"Hey, Panta-chan. Did Ouma turn in for the night?"

She blinked up at him, mewling quietly in response.

"...I really wish I could speak cat." Saihara sighed. The cat instead slipped onto the floor, tugging on the hem of his shirt towards the door. “OH, he went outside… _Oh, he went outside._ ” The detective sprang to his feet, nearly topping over due to the cat hanging from his shirt from the sudden movements and carefully unhooked her, letting her climb onto his shoulder. With that, they stepped outside and into the city. The fog that had condensed over the streets only served to increase his growing worry, which was counteracted by Panta’s soft purrs against his neck, causing him to enter some strange sense of emotional limbo.

Saihara’s thought process was in the process of melting into a jumbled mess when he caught something glow from the corner of his eye. He turned and squinted, trying to figure out what kind of light it was. It was a strange violet-pink shade, too natural to be the florescent lights of the city, and it gave off strange smoke—What the fuck. The detective stared in surprise before rushing to the light, it’s intensity the only thing guiding him through the fog.

He slowed to a stop as he took in the sight in front of him. The area was peppered with pink flames, lapping at the misty night air. Saihara felt a chill as his brain forced him to remember a similar scenario when the incubus had to deal with Angie. The detective broke out into a run, ignoring Panta's claws digging into his shoulder in an effort to stay upright as he followed the trail of flames. Eventually, it led him to the end of an alley, and a small figure fidgeting with their clothes. As he stepped closer, a wave of relief hit Saihara like a brick house.

“Well, _that_ could’ve gone smoother.” Ouma muttered as he smoothed out his dress, noting how the edges were singed with bright lace-like burn marks. Just when he was thinking about how cute they were, they faded off, causing the male to pout.

 _"Ouma-kun!!"_ Saihara blurted out. The incubus whipped his head around and opened his mouth before he was crushed into a tight hug. Once he registered the sound of purring and a familiar sweet scent, he returned the hug, burying his face into his friend's hoodie.

"Saihara-chan, you forgot your hat! You made this poor defenseless demon fend for himself, how are you gonna take responsibility?" Ouma pouted. Saihara pulled back from the hug and gave an apologetic smile.

"Sorry. How about I make you dinner tonight?" he offered. Ouma paused, a light pink dusting his cheeks before he broke out into a wide grin.

"Hand-made dinner from my beloved Saihara-chan? I knew he loved me after all!" the incubus giggled as he pressed against Saihara's side, grabbing Panta and cradling her in his arms. The detective shook his head and chuckled, guiding them back home.

"Ah, by the way, Ouma-kun? What was with that strange fire, are you ok?" he frowned. Ouma looked up at his friend curiously, before grinning.

"Who knows!" He sang, taking the worn hat off his head and playfully landing it on the detective's own head. Despite the carefree answer, he wasn’t lying. He had no clue where that surge of energy came from, nor what exactly it did to his body. All he knows is that now, he was safe and could finally relax for the night. Maybe he'll figure out what it was and how he could tap into it later. It'd definitely come in handy...

* * *

 

 _"...Kukuku.."_ Korekiyo stood in front of a broken mirror, examining the damage. A few burns here and there, but otherwise, he was ok. He traced the Glasgow-like scars on the corners of his lips gingerly, noting how, for a brief moment, they had a pink tinge similar to the fires that burned him.

_"Ouma Kokichi... what a beautiful mystery you are..."_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> AND thats it for now  
> next update is a very special  
> fluffy companion update :3c


	18. No Fluffer Required PT 1

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> WH O A SHI T HEY YALL ITS BEEN A HOT SECOND  
> FIRST OFF ITS ME KOKICHIRIN i just changed my name bc while i still love it it admittedly feels highly restricting ;w;  
> im sorry i died im not into dr as much as i used to anymore HOWEVER this fic is my baby and i am determined to see it through to the end  
> the amount of support and attention its gotten even now made me so so happy and ngl is the reason my spark came back and i had some energy to spare to keep writing  
> so thank yall for that <3333  
> ive also been thinking of going back and rewriting some of the chapters because some of them are,,, ok no literally every single chapter including this one (except maybe one? i forget sdfmkdmfksmf) is unbeta'd and i feel like it shows  
> there are some moments i feel i couldve written better but well have to see ;w;  
> i also apologize i promised the next update would be a more panta focused one but i kinda hit a snag because what even are cats,,, its halfway finished tho so maybe itll be after this  
> nonetheless i hope yall enjoy this update! its gonna be split into parts as usual bc i love mini arcs-  
> (thank you acey for helping me think of a title for this chapter i almost went w walk walk fashion baby but hOLY SHIT MAN MDKSMFDF)

_"God, I can’t believe them..." the woman ran a hand through her hair, sighing softly. Her free hand was tapping against the cool steel of the bench, nails creating a rhythmic clicking filled with agitation. "They believe a silly article over their own kin--!" she stilled, taking a deep breath and exhaled. No need to be angry, it wouldn't solve anything. But something else could.._

_"I guess I'll have to ask him for help... Hahah, we’re gonna get such a scolding, interrupting his down time with something like this..."_

* * *

 

Blue eyes were staring across the classroom, examining the petite figure perched on top of one of the desks, face alight with mischief as he teased his classmate below. They narrowed as the girl they belonged to clasped her hands together, index fingers pressing against her lips in thought. That Ouma was an absolute _enigma_. Everyone knew that. But that wasn’t her main focus right now. She looked him over intently, as if mapping out his entire body. Certainly not weird, and certainly not comment worthy.

"Uh.. Shirogane-chan?" Kaede piped next to her, an uneasy look on her face as she looked between her classmates. "You're doing it again."

"Yeah, you're eying him like a dog eying a piece of meat! You thirsty for some shrimp dick or something?" Miu yelped as her comment received a harsh elbow to her side. Tsumugi suddenly sprung from her pose, body straightened up as she stared at him both.

"Nothing of the sort!! Ouma-kun has been calling me for favors lately." The bluenette jabbed her finger into the other girls' direction theatrically. "Did you know he got me into sewing him a custom made maid outfit for his work??"

"Oh, I should've known you had a hand in it. Wonderful work as usual, by the way." Kaede chirped, a bemused smile on her face.

"Oh, why thank you, it's one of my finest wor—wait you know about it?"

"Of course, it's a cute café and the food's delicious! Anyway, continue."

Tsumugi paused, she and Miu blinking in bewilderment before the cosplayer opened her mouth once more.

"Anyway, he insisted on repaying me, and it took me a while to figure out the perfect proposal, but then it hit me—just look at him!" she turned and gestured, yanking her hand back with a small squeal as the male in question was right in front of her. Ouma grinned, a slight hint of fang accenting the mischief still vibrant in his eyes.

"What's this? Shirogane-chan thinking about _proposing_ to me? I hate to break it to you but while you're an absolute sweebheart, I’m already engaged to my lovely Saihara-chan over there! We’re planning on getting married next summer, y'know!"

"No we’re not." Saihara called from his seat almost immediately after.

Tsumugi clicked her tongue in mild annoyance.

"Ouma-kun, don’t think I didn’t catch that. We’re both Japanese, that's an inapplicable term!"

"Would you rather me call you something more applicable but _less_ flattering?" he put his hands to his cheeks, eyes sparkling. She held her hands up immediately.

"I have _pride_ in my interests, not shame! _Anyways_ ," she cleared her throat. "I'm glad you decided to eavesdrop, I finally figured out how you can repay me for making that maid outfit."

"Not gonna lie, it’s damn sexy, so thanks again for making it."

"Of course. Back on topic, we'll discuss it after class. So don’t get too caught up in your teasing."

* * *

 

"So, I heard that Ouma-kun had a nasty run in with some creep the other night?" Kaede was walking with Saihara and Miu once classes were over. The sidewalk they were on was framed by the crisp warm colors of autumn, leaves crunching underneath their feet.

“I mean, I think he did?" Saihara rubbed the back of his neck. "He didn’t really elaborate on what happened, just that he had to 'fend for himself'."

"Ya think it was that weird serial killer that's been going around lately?" Miu crossed her arms.

“Possibly.. But their victims tend to be women. Looking into the case, the male victims could be someone else entirely.." The raven haired male mused. "Ah, on that note, I'd like you two to be careful, I would hate for either of you to become a victim."

"You too, Saihara-kun. Being a detective hunting him down after all, I worry for your safety too." Kaede smiled. Miu, however, let out a loud noise of discomfort.

"Hey, can we change the subject to something _less_ dick-softening? Like, what was up with Tsumugi earlier today? I tried to tag and see when she wanted with Ouma, and she practically glared me out to door!" she grumbled, fidgeting slightly. “I bet they're secretly fucking... or something!"

“I highly doubt it." Saihara chuckled, shaking his head. He was sure that with how heavily fixated his flatmate was on him, it'd be nothing short of a miracle if he set his sights on someone else. Unless it was to make him jealous. Then that'd be… an entire situation altogether. The detective decided to set that thought to the side. "Knowing Shirogane-san, it probably has to do with her work."

_“Right as always, Saihara-kun!"_

The trio stopped in their tracks and turned to the source of the voice. Behind one of the trees along the sidewalk appeared Tsumugi, eyes obscured by the glare of her glasses.

"Shirogane-chan, were... Were you waiting behind that tree for us to come by??" Kaede gaped.

"That's beside the point." The cosplayer adjusted her glasses, glare disappearing to show the excitement sparkling in her eyes. “I want you three to come with me, as my masterpiece is finally complete!"

In the end, she didn’t give them much of a choice, shoving the trio into the direction of her work studio.

* * *

 

Upon entering the studio, the three took a look at their surroundings. Hints to a doorway was off to the side, probably leading to her actual workspace, expertly hidden by the paint and props scattered about. The room was bright and colorful, reminiscent of a ice cream shop. Saihara, however, took notice of two figures sitting at a table in front of the fake building. One was a girl with bright red hair swept off to the side with a small clip fastened into the side. Her face and arms was decorated with freckles, complimenting her grey eyes in a suble, earthy way. She was tapping at the backside of her camera and chatting about to the other, who was much smaller than her. They had short messy pink hair, streaks of it being a much lighter, almost white with longer strands framing their cheeks and fading into a softer purple shade. Their blue eyes were alight with curiosity as they stared at the camera, humming while chewing on a lollipop. Saihara found himself squinting and tilting his head ever so slightly as he examined their attire. A simple white shirt tied with a dainty red ribbon under a slightly oversized light blue jacket and dark pants cutting off halfway on the shins. What got him was how one of the belts hanging off their sides trailed behind them with a heart shaped buckle.

It felt too familiar.

The redhead looked up once she heard the group approach and scoffed.

"It took you long enough! Were you hiding behind a tree to make some grand appearance or something?"

"Besides the point. Anyway! Akamatsu-chan, Iruma-chan, Saihara-kun, what do you think?" she turned to them expectantly.

"It's a very beautiful workspace!" Kaede smiled, looking around with wonder.

"No, this is just to take photos of him!" Tsumugi pouted, gesturing to the pink haired male. He has his cheeks puffed into a small pout as he tugged the lollipop out of his mouth. His eyes watered as if he was seconds away from crying.

"After Shirogane-chan went through all the effort of dolling me up... How mean is that?" The trio faultered at his voice.

"What the fuck??" Miu barked.

"O-Ouma-kun, it’s really you?" Saihara stared in disbelief. "You look like a completely different person..”

"Don't I?" Ouma chirped in a sugary playful voice. He put his fists up to his face and sway is his seat, staring up at them with those wide doe eyes in a sort of excitable cutesy pose. Saihara had to beat down the flushed that threatened to stain his cheeks.

"So, uh.. Is this what Shirogane-chan wanted with you?" Kaede blinked. "To test out her costumes?"

Ouma clicked his tongue as he reclined into a more lax pose, waving the half eaten lollipop around in his hand lazily.

"Oh, I'm doing more than just testing out. Y'know why our beloved Koizumi-chan is here?" he sang, willingly ignoring her protest to the nickname.

"To take pictures of your twink looking ass?" Miu snorted.

"Try to think before you bark, you disgusting bitch." Ouma shot back, causing her to cower. "But in a way, you are right." It was Kaede's turn to guess.

"You're doing a cosplay photoshoot?"

"Ding ding diiing! You got it!" the incubus sang. "Of course, the bitchlet said the same thing, but I only accept civil answers." He popped to his feet, the belts clinking together in response. Saihara tried not to stare at the belt that looked suspiciously as the tail he was a little too familiar with. Ouma's next statement, however, got his full attention.

"It's not just this photoshoot. Shirogane-chan asked if I would like to be a model for her designs and cosplays!"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> first time plugging fsmkdmf bUT if yall wanna keep in touch and/or follow where i AM alive i post animations and stuff on my youtube moonblossoms and i also scream alot on twitter @ planetstardream
> 
> (ps while i try to keep the characters as in character as possible please let me know if i misstep any boundaries (especially w mius nonexistant filter whe e zes) and ill be sure to correct it immediately! <3)
> 
> EDIT BC IM A GODDAMN F O O L the maid outfit is a reference to this fic acey wrote https://archiveofourown.org/works/16181390 bc goddamn is it a+

**Author's Note:**

> yeet  
> despite ouma being an incubus theres not gonna be any smut tho since im kinda  
> dnsjkfnsf about writing that sorry yall orz  
> there is gonna be sexual humor tho  
> at least no more than what youd expect in canon  
> stay alive saihara-chan


End file.
